Today was my first day back in the office.

It's good to be back. Very good.

I think when you're away from the town you live in for a little while and then come back, you come to experience a new appreciation and thankfulness for it. :o)

I'm happy to be back.

Today was kind of a nice day. I was off from work still, since I arrived back a day earlier than I'd originally thought I would.

It was nice outside.

I had to go to McKinney to get a calendar but the trip was well worth it because of the pretty trees and little hills I saw (almost didn't look like Texas :o)) and the yummy free meal I enjoyed at McAlisters. Free because I had used up my nine entrees on my supper club card. They even let me have my drink free. Yippee!! :oD

Yesterday I drove in, but from Jackson so it wasn't nearly as long a drive. (YAY!) I stopped at the Terrell outlet mall and found some great bargains -- a really cute pair of khaki capri pants at the Van Heusen outlet on clearance for $10!! They even fit me perfectly, which is an amazing feat generally for pants or jeans. :o) Needless to say, I was pleased.

I also at at Schlotsky's, one of my all-time favorite restaurants.

I'm going through something kind of hard at the moment. Yet by faith (not my emotions yet!) I'm thankful if it will be used to drive me closer to Jesus. And I believe it will -- or can be! Oh how I need to stay close to Him. He is truly a wonderful God. There is none like Him. He will never leave us nor forsake us. How wonderful!

Tonight my mom and I ate supper with a big group of relief workers at the church. I have so much been touched by these dear brothers and sisters in Christ and their hearts to come from all over the U.S. and labor long hours on behalf of people in need. It is my prayer that just as we have seen many come to Christ through our tsunami outreach in Asia (www.gfa.org/tsunami), they too will see an incredible harvest of souls.

God is good. Even in the pain ... even in the midst of the storm.

Yesterday I made the 600-mile drive to my hometown. Yikes! I'd forgotten how long it was. It felt especially long for some reason.

But today was incredible. Worshipped at my beloved college church. Caught up with friends and supporters there ... and made new ones!

Ate lunch at Applebee's with this really fun couple who supports me. Enjoyed more fellowship at the church's Christmas open house. And the one-hour drive back to my hometown tonight felt small compared to 11 hours yesterday.

This week has been going by so FAST.

It's Thursday. WOW.

Things are going quite well overall!

I still have much to get done before my trip home in a week or so ... both at the office and at home ... and things to tend to with my car. But things have gotten done as well. I feel optimistic that everything will come together. :oD

Today I got a coupon in the mail for Arby's, buy fries and a drink and get a free Market Fresh sandwich (which I love but are kind of expensive!). I used it for lunch and was quite happy. :oD

It's the little things in life that matter so much sometimes.

I had such a nice Thanksgiving weekend.

It was just really relaxing and refreshing.

Thursday I ate Thanksgiving dinner with my Sunday school teacher, his family, and some others who, like me, were away from family. It was a restful time and I felt at home. :o)

Then Friday I met up for a little bit with a friend of mine from class, a single mom and her two children. I also just hung around the apartment and sang praise songs.

Saturday I met up with several others from my S.S. class to watch "Yours, Mine and Ours" and fellowship over Chinese food (them) and Chick-fila (me :o)) in the mall food court. I really enjoyed that ... good times. :oD

Yesterday? After church we all grabbed something to eat at Chipotle and had more fellowship ... chatting with my S.S. teacher and his wife about the incredible thing Jesus did for us in dying an excruciating death for us on the Cross and paying the penalty for our sin. Then I joined some others in the class who were sitting at a table outside, where we engaged in a fun and kind of thought-provoking conversation about "the whole guy/girl thing".

Today has been a good day at work. I can't believe it's already over. It's gone by so quickly ... and yet I feel that I've gotten things done. YAY! Thank you, LORD. I really am feeling like everything is kind of starting to come together for my upcoming trip back to the Coast. :o)

Until next time.

Thanksgiving is almost here. :o)

Looking at my life, there is much to be thankful for.

I'm looking forward to the holiday weekend to rest and maybe catch up on stuff!

Tonight I need to grab ingredients at the store, for the salad I'm making. I'm eating Thanksgiving Dinner with a family from church, along with others from my S.S. class.

Until next time. :oD

I've had a nice day!

I went to lunch with a friend and co-worker, Kaitlyn. We had such a nice time of sharing some of what the Lord is teaching us.

I have been thinking lately about how with Jesus, you have everything. Even if you have nothing as far as this world goes. Or if you lost literally everything in the tsunami or in Hurricane Katrina, or live in a North Indian slum where the place you "go home" to every day is little more than a makeshift tent strewn together with garbage bags, little pieces of tin, anything else you can find.

Gretcha with her contageous smile and joy in Jesus showed me THAT. A powerful lesson I don't ever want to forget ... and something I want to put into practice in my daily life.

What a joy the Christian life is ... that this world and our circumstances and struggles are NOT all there is. That we can labor for fruit that will last for all eternity. Incredible.

And who are we, that we have this privilege? It's all God. And nothing in us.

It's Friday. I am tired ... ready to go home. : )

I love my job. But sometimes you need a break, too. :oD Looking forward to this weekend. It's been beautiful out ... maybe I'll even get some biking in!

That would be nice.

See ya!

Wow.

I feel so encouraged. You could say I feel "all better". :o) My friend Teri and I just finished praying together.

God is so good.

I'm walking home now. :oD

Kind of an intense weekend.

Sorting through some stuff. Realizing my wretchedness. Realizing the warped perspectives and attitudes I still have ... but don't want to have. When I am resting in the Lord, those attitudes fade away. I'm sure glad He never gives up on me.

On another note, I did enjoy walking and riding my bike this weekend. Beautiful weather. And it's so nice to be outdoors.

Well bye for now -- better leave the office since I can't be here after 9. :o) I'll write more soon ... I promise? :oD

Has it really been two weeks since I last wrote? Wow.

The cooking went well. (See last entry, October 29)

Overall I've been doing really well!

It's a little cloudy today, perhaps to match my somewhat melancholy mood. Long story. I want to go back to my apartment and have some time with the Lord. My desire is to be lost in the wonder of His presence ... to be so enamored with Him that, ultimately, everything else fades away. He is so good!

Tonight I am getting together with some friends to go to the Olive Garden ... kind of an outing planned in my honor since I told my friend Trudy I needed a group here to go to the Olive Garden with since ours back home got destroyed in the hurricane. :oD I'm looking forward to that.

I can't believe it's only a month now before I head back home for Christmas. Wow. I'm excited, at the same time there's much to be done before then. But I know it will all come together. :o)

God is good. Always and no matter what.

P.S. Tomorrow is the International Day of Prayer for the Persecuted Church (IDOP). Wow. I know that anything I go through is so small compared to what they go through every day ... not to mention what Jesus went through for me on the Cross. Incredible. We are truly blessed ... why can it be so easy to forget that?

This has been such a nice weekend so far.

Last night I helped my S.S. class with a booth for our church's Harvest Festival. One of my buddies pelted me in the face with the beanie bags we were throwing. It was pretty funny. Then we all headed to Applebees for more laughter and fun.

When I got home, I looked through a bunch of my recipes and got really inspired. A grocery list and $36 spent at Wal-mart later, I'm still inspired.

But I'll have to wait 'til tomorrow because soon I'll be going to a Matt Redman worship concert with some friends.

Looking forward to it.

This weekend our S.S. group went camping at Lake Texoma. It was nice weather ... well, mostly, that is. It did get a little chilly at night .... and the last morning was very windy.

A fun adventure of the weekend was getting recruited to play in a handbell choir that was performing at their church potluck on the campgrounds. :oD The really cool thing? I got a B-1, 2004 Annual Report and latest issue of SEND! into their hands. Please pray they will read these materials and that the Lord will bring eternal fruit through this!

I woke up and it was cold this morning.

And now? My shoulder is kind of hurting (again) and I'm a little tired and disoriented. But God is faithful. I'm trying to remember that. My tsunami article is almost ready to turn in -- yay! :o) And tomorrow A.M. I should be able to turn in my other article ...

This Friday us writers are leaving work a little early to go to Starbucks and work on projects there. I'm looking forward to that!

Today we went to the annual Peanut Festival of Whitesboro, Texas.

It was a nice, refreshing adventure.

I actually did kareoke. Twice. For all on the streets of this small town to witness.

First in the morning I did "My Girl" and then later in the day I did an encore performance of "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" ... except the second song was NOT the version I'd expected, and therefore I didn't know it. At least I did "My Girl" justice. ;oD

Then someone in our group got "arrested" and put in jail. We had to bail him out. Before I go any further, I must explain something. At this event, you could actually pay to put your friends in jail. So we had one of the people in our group put in the little jail they had set up. Then our group had to pay $2.00 to get him out.

Quite funny.

It was a beautiful day.

Whew! I went through some hard times recently.

But a very encouraging phone conversation, some prayer and a few hugs later, I am doing much better. :oD

God is so good. It seems He was so faithful to bring me encouragement at just the right moments.

And in the middle of my little "trial", I thought about how it is likely at least partly spiritual attack -- I worked on an earthquake email yesterday, and I am excited about the potential there is for people's hearts to be touched and to give and pray.

Of course I must remember that there is nothing in me. It is Jesus who gives me His words. Without Him, I am nothing. I desperately need His intervention on the articles I am working on for SEND!. I am feeling writers block, and am at a standstill in some ways. I know He is able! I've just got to trust Him ... for that and for something else that's kind of been on my heart.

He is good and desires my ultimate best. I can trust Him. Hallelujah!

Well it is beautiful weather and I plan to maybe try to work just a little on SEND! stuff before I go and enjoy it. :o) Tonight I hope to go to Barnes and Noble and hear a fresh word from the Lord to help me as I work on these articles in one my favorite college spots. :o)

I had a nice weekend. Much of it, I had my windows open. It was so gorgeous outside.

I've been so much finding that our Friday night prayer meetings are a faith-builder. I find myself being greatly renewed and strengthened through them as I hear the encouraging reports from the field and am encouraged to pray in faith.

Saturday I woke up at 11 because a friend called. It was good she called ... who knows how long I would have slept after all-night prayer? :oD

Later in the day I played soccer with some friends from the office. Good times; good exercise. :oD

Then yesterday Steph and I went to Ikea (one of my favorite stores!) and then walking in this beautiful area by a new library. There are two lakes with paths around them.

And now? I'm going to enjoy some more of this beautiful weather. Thank you, Lord.

Wow. It is beautiful out there.

We have prayer tonight at the ministry.

In between now and then, I think I may just go out and enjoy this nice weather. :o) I don't have much planned this weekend except catching up on walking and working on my SEND! articles. And that's fine with me.

It's been a good week, I think.

I can't believe how quickly it's gone by.

It's a little chilly outside. But feels nice. It's maybe in the 60s. I'm debating whether to brave the wintry mix by walking at the nature preserve or curl up in the warm shelter of my apartment. :o) Maybe watch a movie, maybe pour over "Let the Nations Be Glad", a book by John Piper that I'm really looking forward to reading.

Which reminds me ... this quote from a little booklet I got last week really spoke to me.

“My Heart—Christ’s Home” by Robert Boyd Munger.

~I will never forget the evening I invited him into my heart … He came into the darkness of my heart and turned on the light. He built a fire in the cold hearth and banished the chill. He started music where there had been stillness and harmony where there had been discord. He filled the emptiness with his own loving fellowship. I have never regretted opening the door to Christ and I never will. ~

What a beautiful word picture. As a single woman in her late 20s who believes God has given me the desire to be married one day, just unsure of when and how He will bring it about, this really speaks to my heart. There are times when I get lonely, but I don't really have to be! Every day, every moment, my apartment can be a haven of abiding in Christ. A place where His fire warms the hearth on those chilly days. This is especially vivid to me as my fireplace has an apartment.

God is so good.

It's nice outside.

Saturday I did a triatholon.

Okay, so it wasn't official. It was my own special, personal triatholon.

I walked two hours, bladed 20 minutes, and did some light swimming for an hour.

And I also found a gorgeous park in Richardson. And stopped on my way back to eat at Chick-fila with one of my calendar coupons. :o)

Tonight? I'm hoping to head to Barnes and Noble to work on some SEND! stuff. As far as I know, that will work out. I've been meaning to get down there for maybe a week now! I really like working on projects at Barnes and Noble ... I have such fond memories and nostalgia of it from college.

And I like the one I go to here, too.

I'm also really hoping to get some picking up done in my apartment. It's always nice to have a tidy apartment. :o)

Hiya. This will be a short post as I am ultra sleepy and plan to go home and rest a bit before heading to supper and prayer with a good friend. :o)

Last week I had a nice long post all ready to post here. And then? You guessed it; blogger had technical difficulties and I lost my post. BUMMER. Oh well ...

Things here go well.

I've been working on a few articles for our upcoming SEND!. Those are so much fun! Of course, I'm kind of still in the research phase for the most part. I did start writing one of the shorter articles but have kind of come to a standstill where I need to review my research and see what facts can be woven in.

Truly it is a privilege to be His ambassador. Praise God.

Gorgeous day.

And there are still people who think this all happened by chance? Hard to believe.

I had a good day. Passed pretty quickly. I just got done with a project at work. Now I still need to go and clean my restroom at the office.

After that? I'm thinking about going walking. Then I may use a coupon I have for a FREE shrimp taco at Tin Star. :oD And get my pictures developed at Costco.

That's all for now, folks. :o)

Okay, the weather outside is BEAUTIFUL. Thank You, Lord.

This afternoon a co-worker and I went to the airport to welcome back another gal who works with us. (She had been in India for several months.) It's a nice feeling to have her back. And the Lord has brought others to work with us, as well. I'm very excited about all the people we have in our area now! :oD

Now I'm sleepy.

After I leave here, I'm planning to go back to my apartment for just a little bit and rest. Then? Going for a walk to enjoy this gorgeous day, of course. :o) And pray as I walk. Those are such nice times!

It is so nice to know God can be trusted. And especially to rest in the wonderful, indescribable peace He gives.

This afternoon, sitting upstairs in my office, surrounded by co-workers as we welcomed a new couple on staff, it struck me how very happy and content I felt. How much I felt part of the family of people here. Moments like that are priceless.

BTW, the new couple, whom I'll call Clint and Jenny, are really nice. I am incredibly excited that they will be joining us on staff. They are some of those special people who not only have a GREAt sense of humor but also a thoughtfulness and warmth that makes you almost immediately connect with them. Being around them makes me feel invigorated, alive.

They hope to make it back here in November. Praise the Lord. We need to pray for them. They are giving their lives to labor for the Gospel, and the enemy is not happy. But GOD is in control, and HE always wins!

Praise the Lord.

Last night after my friend and I ate supper, I ran into another friend at the office! We chatted and then spontaneously decided to run by McDonalds for a milkshake (me) and sundae (her).

Then we stopped by the apartment of a mutual friend, to fellowship with her. Except she wasn't answering when we knocked (she was on the phone on her balcony, it turned out!), but her cat was walking around outside.

So we planted her cat right by the door (amazingly, she stayed--she even went over there herself!) and then knocked really loudly and ran around the corner. Sad to say, our friend never heard us knock. But if we could have pulled it off, it would have been really hilarious. :oD

Tonight is prayer meeting. And--speaking of prayer--I'm experiencing quite a lot of peace and hopeful expectancy about the thing I'm praying about for this month. So ... we'll see what God does. Regardless of the outcome, I'm ultimately content. :o) His plan is good and perfect!

The weekend was very nice.

I enjoyed all-night prayer and getting together a couple of times with the interns who are serving with us at the ministry for the next year, as well as some of the other young people on staff.

I also visited a new S.S. class for the second time and really liked it. I went and ate with everyone afterwards and had a really nice time. I even got recruited to be part of the worship team. :o)

On a different note, in one sense I have been very encouraged as far what I've been praying about. I want whatever would most glorify the Lord -- whatever that is!

Tonight? I'm going after work to eat with one of the girls I used to room with. And of course we'll pray for one another. :o) I'm really looking forward to it! We meet at 6, so before then I'm probably going to walk around outside and pray. Those are such nice times with the Lord!

And later on tonight? Not sure yet ... would go swimming but I just washed my hair and kind of hate to have to turn around and wash it again. (Yes, I know, I'm lazy. :oD)

It's Friday.

I went through some things over the weekend. But all in all have had a NICE week.

I'm holding on to what as far as I can tell I need to be faithful to pray for (see last week). Haven't missed a day yet as far as I can tell, and don't plan to. But I've definitely been "challenged" and tested along the way ... even if given at different times, very possible "glimmers of hope" : )

Sometimes it's soooooooooooo hard to be patient.

Whatever happens, I am confident that the Lord is doing a work of faith in me through the process.

And now? Well, it's a little after 4 and we all get to go home early since it's Friday night prayer. For starters, I think I'll go home and just have some R&R time at the apartment while I watch a little of Ice Princess. Then I'll probably go pay a bill at the mall and eat some supper with a Chick-fila coupon. :oD

Until next time.

I struggled a little last night with my emotions about the thing I mentioned yesterday that I'm praying about. Singing praise songs helped SO much. I felt a peace about things. But then later in the evening I struggled again.

And something else challenging has come up that I am trying to give over to the Lord and have HIS perspective over ... not always easy.

But He is good and faithful and I can trust Him. Even when my circumstances or emotions may try to wrongly tell me otherwise! Throughout the years I've definitely had a number of times where I've had to say "Okay, Lord. I'm going to trust You by faith." Then it is the most encouraging thing when the feelings later (or sometimes sooner!) follow. Praise God. He is so good.

On a different note ... I just got back from a really nice time with some gals from church -- a "bargain shopping" trip we've been planning for a while. We went to a Dillards clearance sale. And boy did we ever find some bargains!

I ended up with two really cute skirts, three great shirts, a much-needed pair of summer dress shoes, and a cute dress --all for about $80 total!

I think I'll get a lot of use out of everything. The skirts were $108 and $168 before clearance. (Can you imagine?!) And I got the dress for $6 and the shoes for $9. : ) I can't wait to try things on again when I get home -- that's always fun. :o)

Well, I'm going back to my apartment. I think some R&R along with some more time with the Lord will do me good. :o)

Until next time.

Whew! Not long after I wrote that last post, we received word that my parents--and aunt and uncle--were safe. What a relief! I was so glad to hear this.

On kind of another note ... Ever feel like the Lord has impressed on your heart to be faithful to pray for a certain thing but you have no guarantee of the outcome? I'm feeling like that now ... on the one hand I thank God for putting this on my heart to pray for. Then on the other, it's truly a leap of faith because of not knowing the outcome.

But in either case, I can rest assured that He will work everything out beautifully, according to HIS perfect plan -- and will develop more character in my life in the process.

Thursday and still no definite word from my parents since about noon on Monday.

I imagine most phone lines still aren't going through ... and that it could be days and days still ... although my sister did receive a call yesterday from their cell phone, but there was no voice because it disconnected too soon.

We were wondering last night how much drinking water they saved up before the storm ... There are so many uncertainties, yet this entire week my heart has been feeled with this incredible peace and calm that could only come from the Lord. I'm SO glad for that.

I can't believe how quickly this day has gone by. Come to think of it, the week's passed quickly, too.

I've working on various projects, and they've been going well. I think I'm about caught up, so next week I will probably get some more to work on. :o)

Tomorrow morning I'm going over to my Sunday school teacher and his wife's house, along with others in the class, to help them pack. That should be fun!

It's hot out there. It was 104 degrees earlier today!

Well I think I'll get going. I want to go home and rest and maybe go walking before a friend and I hang out and watch a movie.

I'm back. But not for long. It's been one of those afternoons ... although I'm doing much better now!

Tonight I'm going to a women's ministry thing at my church. It sounds like it will be really good! I'm meeting up with a couple of friends so we can sit together.

Ever been in a crowded room and still felt lonely? God has allowed me to go through a number of "lonely" times in my life ... for reasons I may never know this side of heaven.

Last week I turned 27. I would so much like to at least be "dating" the person He has planned for me to marry ... whoever that is. But His timing is PERFECT. I've got to keep believing that.

The cutest little sparrows have found my bird feeder! The one I got birdseed for when my parents were here. Sometimes there are 10 on my balcony at one time! They're so much fun to watch. This morning when I got up, one was feeding another.

I can't believe it's Friday. Wow ... another week has gone by already?

It was a good one ... I think. Looking back, it went by almost too fast for me to remember it!

I had some very interesting experiences, that's for sure. Someone who works at Chick-fila asked me out! Thankfully I was prepared with an answer. I think the Lord really went before me on that! Whew!

And before that happened, someone at Arby's suddenly turned to me and said, "Where did you get your blue eyes?" Is God trying to tell me to stop going to fast food restaurants? :oD

Well it's almost 6 and I'm tired and I'm going home now.

Today was my birthday.

And I felt loved. :o)

In Sunday school this morning, they all sang "Happy Birthday" to me at the end of class. A girl had also brought a carrot cake with cream cheese icing, my favorite. Then she presented me with an adorable gift bag filled with guess what?

Cards!

That's right, each person in the class had written me a card and stuck it in the bag. It was fun to open and read them.

One guy gave me a mother-daughter card. The inside read, "You are a terrific daughter. And I am a proud mother." The outside? "To my little princess." Only Kelly! He's always making us laugh.

After church was lunch at LaHacienda Ranch. (To quote Dave: "You're not allowed to bail.") Where (of course) the servers all came and sang Happy Birthday to me.

It was a nice birthday. And I felt loved.

This is my 255th post.

I'll try to briefly (as if that's even possible for me? :oD) recap the events of the last week.

Thursday, August 5
9:00 P.M.
My parents arrive at my apartment. Their first time to see my new apartment! They're here for the weekend. I've been looking forward to their visit. Tonight after they got in, they were hungry so we got to eat some of the 3-bean soup I had made for them. :o)

Tomorrow we're going to try to find me a new washer machine. Well, that's if my current one can't be fixed or is expensive to fix. Like my dryer, it was a gift to my roommates and I, maybe two years ago. A huge blessing. Now? Well, it may be on its last leg. My trips to the apartment laundry room are getting a little old. (But I'm still grateful for all the use we've gotten out of it --Praise the Lord for His provision!)

Friday, August 6
Mission accomplished.
The washer would have been expensive to fix, so we were able to find a washer on a good sale, rated well by Consumer Reports (used by my dad many a time :o)). When we went to the mall to purchase the washer, we also ate at Chick-fila. I had great coupons for all of us -- buy a drink, get a free southwest chargrilled chicken salad. Now you can't beat THAT. I also had coupons for free cookies (for each of us!) at the Great American Cookie Co. Fun!

We also went to the Ikea store. WOW. That place is HUGE! And quite popular. We didn't buy anything, basically just walked around for over two hours. It's a fun place to be. Much of the decor (although not all) is not particularly my style, but I think my good friend Heather from back home would really like some of it.

DEFINITELY a store I plan to go back to.

When we got back home, we finished eating our cookies, and ... I don't remember what all else we did. I think just stuff around the apartment, though. Tonight we went for a little bit of all-night prayer at the ministry and my parents were able to catch up with some people there. :o)

Saturday, August 7
We did things around the apartment and went to Wal-mart and Target looking for different household items. My parents got me a birthday present at Garden Ridge, a beautiful picture for my dining room! It is pretty big and has kind of muted pinks, blues, etc. And it's a picture of a vase with flowers. My other walls, um, also have flowers on them? What can I say, I'm just a flower person. :o)

Tonight we had a couple of gals from my S.S. class over. We looked at some of their pictures and showed them a couple of short GFA videos about our Bridge of Hope program. It was a wonderful time of laughter and fellowship! My parents enjoyed getting to meet them both. I knew they'd like them!

Sunday, August 8
To be finished tomorrow :o) Heading back to my apartment now.

It's been a nice day.

We writers had two meetings this morning. And I worked on some things. Then I had a nice, relaxing lunch at one of my favorite places (McAlisters) while working on my "To Do" list for the next day or so. :o) Oh, and this afternoon I finished up my other article I was working for to go in our next SEND!.

Now I need to get home and do some more picking up and probably make some 3-bean soup. I have family coming to see me later this week, which will be nice!

TTFN.

I'm back.

I feel very encouraged ... the Lord has been giving me little opportunities here and there to share (even if just a little bit) about the ministry, as well as putting different people and avenues on my heart. What a blessing!

As I sit here writing this from my second-story cubicle in the office, I am watching a couple of birds eagerly peck at a bag (of potato chip crumbs?). Besides it being really cute to watch, I also saw a great spiritual analogy ...

I got to thinking, here they are all excited about this bag. But what if a much bigger bag, with more food, is about to come their way? From their frame of reference, they can't see that. But it doesn't make the possibility any less real.

God's ways and His timing are always best.

Hi. It's me again.

I'm writing in here more often now. :o) Today I went to lunch with some friends from work. That was nice.

I didn't stay the whole time because I came home to write an emergency email that would point to an urgent story for prayer. The Lord really went before me and brought everything together! (Be sure to check out the story, which my supervisor wrote, and pray for this impoverished area that is going through so much.)

I also heard from some supporters that they would like to be on my email list I'm putting together. I enjoy hearing from my supporters!

It's been a busy day. I just now got back to my desk after helping the young people (teenagers) clean in the building. My cleaning partner and I had such a good time of fellowship as we prayed for each other at the end.

It's a beautiful day out there. I'm about to head out and ... I don't know what. Probably go back to my apartment to rest for a bit, then maybe go walking. I know that later tonight I need to work for a while on my SEND! articles which are due very soon! I pray the Lord goes before me and brings everything together like He did this afternoon.

This workday went by fast! It is so pretty outside. If you read the post below, you'll see that I'm doing MUCH better than I was last week -- YAY! :o))))

This afternoon as I was reading a Christian magazine article, possible source material for a Dalit article I'm working on for SEND!, I felt like I got a glimpse into another world. The article mentioned thousands of people gathering every Sunday in a field in an area of India, traveling to get there by foot, bicycle, or whatever other means of transportation they could find. And they carried in sick people on cots and chairs, voicing their cries for help ... and listening to the message that Jesus loves them ... that they are cherished by their benevolent Creator.

One thing that spoke to me was the deep hunger for God's Word. When the missionaries came in with New Testaments and other Christian literature, the rush of the people was so great that at one point the missionaries were cornered into their vehicle. Outreach team members then began proclaiming the message of God's love to those who had gathered, as they handed people their own copy of God's Word.

Incredible. When I hear stories like that, I am transported into another world. A world that doesn't revolve around me. A world where the Word of God is living and active, alive and fresh. A world where "other things" suddenly don't seem to matter so much ... they start to pale in comparison. Lord, help me to live in that world.

Now I'm going home to have some time with the Lord. I'm going to read in Romans 12:9-21, the passage from yesterday's message at church. A while back, when I was meditating on the sermon passage throughout the week, the Lord spoke to my heart so much -- so I plan to start doing that again. :o)

WOW. I'm doing SO much better. In fact, I'm probably doing great. :o) I'm so very thankful.

I ended up having such a nice weekend. On Saturday some of us from the office helped move a co-worker into the apartment she and her husband-to-be will share after they get married next weekend. And after that, three of us gals ended up taking an impromptu trip to three different malls. At the second mall, we also ate at Chick-fila. Such a blast! I ended up with a sarong skirt, a couple of headbands and a pair of blue open-back Keds. Early birthday presents, I told them. :oD

Yesterday was Sunday school and lots of fun laughs in class. :O) Then after church we all went to eat at Luigi's. Then my friend Mellie and I announced that we were going to see a movie at the dollar theater, and several others joined us. That was fun!

I also had a nice walk at the nature preserve later that day, and a really good talk with my parents. :O) And some yummy lettuce wraps, and I re-watched part of a fun movie.

I'm feeling probably slightly better.

The Lord allowed for me to meet up briefly today with Emily, another woman at the ministry. She listened and encouraged and prayed for me. I feel comfortable sharing things with her, which is such a blessing.

Even though she's married with five children, I can sense in her voice and expression that she remembers what it's like to be a single woman, having various struggles and desires and seeking to be right where God wants her to be.

Ever feel like you just "can't quite get it all together"? (I talked to a couple of single gals, friends of mine from the ministry, over lunch today, and they totally agreed that they've been there!) I've been kind of feeling that way a lot lately ... like, where does all the time go? And why am I so tired all the time? (Probably in big part because I was sick last week) And when I try to sit down and spend time with the Lord, why is it so hard to focus? Probably a big part of it is the spiritual battle.

When I was talking to Emily today, she said, "Your heart to please Him is beautiful. And your heart is what He desires, and then everything else will follow." Loosely paraphrased, but the basic point of what she was saying. I needed to hear those words of encouragement today.

I know I have a long way to go, but He has given me a heart to seek Him. For that I am so thankful. And He doesn't give up on me. I just need to trust Him.

Well, this month is my month to help clean the building, so I'm going to go work on some things so I can leave a little early tomorrow after work, to go see Shakespeare in the Park with some friends from church. :o) That should be fun.

It's Wednesday.

And it's a beautiful day out there. But it hasn't been the easiest week. I've been unusually tired, still recovering from being sick, and have had kind of a weak stomach.

More than that, though, I'm having some confusing thoughts. I so much desire the Lord's peace! And according to His Word --which is absolutely TRUE-- it is attainable!

I came across verse during lunch yesterday:

The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.
--Isaiah 58:11

I didn't see the last sentence of the verse until later -- but isn't it cool? The whole image is such a nice one. That's how I want to be -- "...like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail". Right now I feel like I'm kind of GRASPING ... wanting to be at that point but just not quite there at the moment, and not quite sure how to get there? Help me, Lord. I know You are able!

Okay.

I'm back, and no, I didn't get to dress up like a cow for Cow Appreciation Day last Friday. So much for my public debut. Maybe next year. :o)

I got sick and was disappointed because I had to cancel not only those plans, but also everything else I had planned for the weekend. But I think the Lord taught me something about surrender through it? I had some rough days, especially with being worn out physically and major spiritual attacks on my emotions. But Friday night I did have some good time with the Lord.

And yesterday was nice -- I was able to make it to church, and to hang out with my S.S. friends at Bennigan's afterwards. Of course one buddy teased me saying I should wear my costume to church next week. :o) We're all going to Shakespeare in the Park this weekend -- that should be fun!

Today? I've been kind of like a zombie ... well, especially in the morning. See, with sleeping so much during the day, I've had trouble getting to sleep the last couple nights. I slept very little Saturday night, even though I was tired. But this afternoon has been so much better and I was able to focus more on things at work. That was a blessing!

Pray for sleep. At the right times.

So this is my 246th post. Pretty cool.

As I sit up here in my desk at the office, I have a beautiful view of houses, trees, apartments, and even buildings on the horizon -- framed by glorious big, open sky.

Today was a good day. I had the opportunity to go eat lunch with a friend from the office, Karene.

The weekend was good, too! Friday was extended prayer here at the ministry ... I left at 12:30 after helping to clean up, because I was soooooo tired and my left shoulder had been hurting.
That day both our 3rd Quarter SEND! and 2004 Annual Report appeared in our mailboxes at work, which was pretty exciting! I had the opportunity to write the radio and Muslim outreach features for SEND! this time around -- you can check them out in our latest issue at www.gfa.org/send. :o) It's my heart's desire that the hearts of many be touched as they read these stories!

Saturday during the day I didn't do much except do laundry, pick up a little, and take a one-hour nap. Then that night I met up with several others in my S.S. class to see The Pacifier at the dollar theater.

Wanna know something funny? Friday I am dressing up in a cow costume and actually making a public appearance ... twice. Hey, it's for a good cause (see www.chickfila.com), plus the fact that I'm just about ALWAYS up for free food, especially when it's Chick-fila. :o)

There will be people and cameras to witness my costume debut.

Another nice weekend.

It was a very memorable 4th of July holiday!

On Friday I went to a pool party at my Sunday school teacher's house. We all had so much fun hanging out and laughing, and splashing in the water!

Saturday I slept in and did stuff around the apartment. Then Sunday I hung out again with my S.S. class.

And Monday? Some coworkers and I went to a church event complete with hot dogs, sno cones, cotton candy and an inflatable "waterslide". :o)

So it was a very nice weekend!

I had such a nice weekend.

Spent Saturday and Sunday with my sister and her family.

We did all of the below, plus more. :o)

Shopped at the mall and Old Navy
(My sister and I came out with on-sale shorts that we really liked, and I found some really cute striped flip-flops at Old Navy that, at $3.99, were a bargain! They'll be great to wear to work and church with my black skirts and other things.)

Celebrated my 2-year-old nephew's "half Birthday" with homemade (yes!) cake and Breyers oreo ice cream.

Ate at a really fun restaurant called HulaHut
(My sister and I split a salad :o))

Hung out with their neighbors
(They're so nice, and, as it turns out, ended up giving me one of their "extra" DVD players! Incredible how the Lord provides.)

Good times. :o) I so much am looking forward to going to see them again! I can't believe it had been nearly a year since I'd been down there. Boy, how time flies when you're having fun and serving the Lord. :o)

9:35 P.M.
I'm at Target, trying on a "fun" shirt. Translation? Fun, meaning I could definitely wear it around the house, and with just a few alterations, could probably also wear it out places.

It's on sale for $12.99.

Not a bad price, but not "super-duper" cheap, either. Trying on the shirt, I think about the family we just did a web story on, who were brutally hacked to death in Central India for their Christian faith and Gospel witness.

And suddenly I am struck by the contrast ... and finding myself transported to another world.

This dear, sweet little family probably didn't have much to their name. Let alone could even one family member be shopping "for fun". Say, for shirts at Target or its equivalent.

Yet exceedingly great is their reward in heaven.

I end up deciding on another piece of clothing -- will make a great skirt for the office and church. Even at $12.99, it's a bit more practical than the other thing.

Still, in this area I probably have a long way to go.

I get to the checkout. Turns out, the "skirt" is still $14.99, not on sale for $12.99. In keeping with what I already decided, I don't get it.

Hmmm ... maybe I am learning at least a little bit after all. :o)

I had a nice weekend.

Friday I stayed for Part One of the Lord of the Rings trilogy and a little bit of the second. :O)

Saturday morning I was tired and a little sad about something, but then that afternoon I had such a nice time with the Lord!

Then I took an hour and a half nap (much-needed! :o)) and my friend Christine and I went to a hot dog cookout they were having at our apartment complex. We sat by the pool for a while enjoying the nice breeze and talking. Then we went and had ice cream at her apartment. :oD It was a nice, relaxing time.

Sunday I introduced my friends from Sunday school to my black boot. Some of them teased that they couldn't believe I was wearing a big 'ole boot, just for a fractured toe. :oP We all had tacos in our classroom after church.

Then that night, four of us hung out playing games. That was fun!

Well, I'm about to go home for lunch, a nap and prayer. Well, that is, if I can squeeze all that in in an hour. ;o) We'll see ... I'm struggling a little with something, but I know God is good and He knows what He's doing. I find sometimes that even just a few minutes in His presence can so much change my perspective. How wonderful.

It's Friday. :o) I'm tired! But it's the weekend so I can catch up a little on my rest! Tonight I'm probably watching part of Lord of the Rings with some friends from the office. They're doing a Lord of the Rings marathon ... good for them! But as for me and my big black boot, we're pretty sleepy ... we'll probably just stay for part of the first one.

My foot is doing much better! But I'm told I'll still have to wear the ever-stylish big black boot through at least the 27th. But praise God! :o) We can rejoice always. He is good.

Tomorrow I'm going to a wedding shower for a good friend of mine who also serves here at the ministry. I'm so happy for her!! Then tomorrow night I may have an opportunity to share the ministry through having some friends for supper and then us going to hear Brother KP speak ... if the Lord wills!

Then Sunday is church and a taco dinner with my S.S. class in our classroom! :o)

I've had a headache this afternoon. ;o( Not fun! But I've had a relatively good week overall. Yay! :O)

Guess what? I fractured my left middle toe playing rugby with some pals from the office on Sunday. So I've been walking around with the ever-stylish big black boot all week. :oD And my toes are kind of bruised and I still can't bend my left middle toe that much at all. But I had so much fun! I would do it again in a heartbeat ... just this time I may wear shoes. : ) (we were ALL playing barefoot)

Well I am going home ... I will probably try to do laundry tonight. Doesn't sound all that appealing tonight, but it's gotta be done sometime. Then again I could always do something fun tonight and wait for the weekend to do laundry ... Hmmm. :o)

I think my headache is already getting bunches better.

I've had a good week. It's gone by fast with projects. I think I'm going home in a minute. :O)

It is beautiful outside. I will probably go walking at the preserve in a little bit. First, though, I need to pay a bill so it won't be late. Not fun, but must be done. :oD

Last night I went and saw a funny movie at the dollar theater. It wasn't my first time to see the movie and I'm sure won't be my last. : ) It was quite relaxing, a nice break!

Not sure what all I'm doing this weekend. I do want to have some good time with the Lord over the weekend. And I need to do laundry. I want to go walking. I'm also getting together with a girl from my S.S. class tomorrow night, most likely. And then on Sunday of course is church and our S.S. group all hanging out afterwards. And Sunday night is my ladies' Bible study.

Okay, so I take back what I said about not having weekend plans. :oP

(I'm taking off. Will be back later.)

Last week I struggled with some discouragement, but this week I've been feeling renewed and refreshed, almost like a new person. I've found in recent weeks and months I have maybe tended to struggle much more with discouragement than usual -- not sure exactly why.

I had a nice weekend. It was pretty restful. Most of the day Saturday it was raining, and I just hung around the apartment. Sunday our group went and ate after church -- We had such a nice time sitting outside at Chipotle, laughing and talking.

This week is going by pretty quickly, which I guess makes sense, considering we were off for Memorial Day. Work is going pretty well -- I have some new projects to work on and am encouraged about that. :o)

Well, I'm gonna go for now, but I will write more later!

The campout last week was a blast! I only wished it could have lasted longer. ;oD Here are some highlights of our time there:

Friday: I arrived at about 6:30. (still can't get over the fact it takes hardly over an hour to get to Oklahoma :o)) After getting just slightly lost (had the right general area), I navigated my way to our campsite, which was right on the shore of Lake Texoma. There were just a couple of us there (I actually thought I'd be late!) and we kind of hung out down by the water for a while. Then when people finally started arriving, we helped get supplies, etc. to the campsite. I had sausage for supper.And later on, of course, we all roasted smores by the campfire. :o)

Okay ... I know I haven't covered Saturday and Sunday yet, but I'll write later ... I promise? :o) I'm kind of ready to get home now.

Saturday: Rolled out of bed, went and took a shower, and had some time with the Lord by the beach. It was such a refreshing, peaceful time! Then I came back to the campsite and we all hung around eating breakfast. Then Rob and I went to Wal-mart and got water and ice. I got a volleyball since the leader of the campout had forgotten his and I'd kind of been wanting one anyhow. The big joke of the weekend was "What did Rob NOT bring?" :o) He had everything, from aluminum foil and graham crackers, to tweezers and a first aid kit. * Incredible. We lazed around in the shade most of the afternoon and then some of us swam out toward an island. That was fun! Trace and I walked around the island and talked, then we began the trip back. A couple of the guys went with us in a canoe, which was a huge blessing, especially since I got tired part of the way there and had to be towed by rope and lifejacket. :oD

*When Trace and I came across some quicksand on the island, I was walking some on it and we joked that if I got caught in it, she could just go get Rob and he would come to my rescue with "Pulley 646". :o)

Sunday: We had a short service with communion, and I took one last walk and had some time with the Lord. I looked out over the lake and thought of how nice the weekend was and how I wanted to stay. :o) Then when I came back, we all had breakfast and picked up everything from the campsite. Then we all pretty much headed home.

I'm doing MUCH better now. And SO thankful. :oD My shoulders were hurting quite a bit this morning, but that wasn't so bad -- I am just glad I've been doing better otherwise!

This weekend is a long-awaited camping trip with my S.S. class. I'm looking forward to that. I have a lot of peace about this trip and feel that this is such a good time for a change of pace. I hope to come back from the weekend refreshed, invigorated, and having had some good times with the Lord in His creation!

I know it's been a while. The last few days have been kind of hard for me. I feel discouraged ... not fun. I feel like the enemy has really been attacking. (Ephesians 6:12) I don't want to feel this way ... I want to focus on the wonderful promises in God's Word and glean encouragement that overcomes these dark times.

Lord God, I pray that I would feel Your arms around me during this time ... that soon You would bring me through this. By faith I thank You for not shrinking back from making me a little more like You through life's circumstances, even when they are painful. Help me feel Your love for me on a heart level. And go before me and give me Your words as I teach Kids Korner tonight, I pray. I love You, Lord.

On a bright note, I went to lunch today with my friend Christine. We had a good time of fellowship together. And, bright note #2, I enjoyed skating with friends over the weekend and going out afterwards with one for late-night icecream bars! (we tried two grocery stores and one Walgreens before settling on our fine delicacy :o))

God is SO GOOD.

If I were picking themes for this past week, that would definitely be one of them. I can't get over the way He has prepared my heart at just the right time for various circumstances ... Kind of a continuation of how He's been teaching me to gladly accept what is or isn't on my plate as from Him and something I can be fully content in and trust Him in.

That peace and presence of mind that He gives is indescribable. It's a wonderful place to be. And yet how often lately a piece of me, at least, has been proud of myself, as though I had achieved something! How silly we can be! :oD I mean, every breath comes from Him. I wouldn't even be here, let alone serving Him in any capacity, if it weren't for Him.

In my flesh dwells no good thing. He deserves ALL the glory. I was just thanking Him last night for the incredible privilege to serve Him here in this way -- I do not deserve it, yet He has seen fit to lavish it on me.

My heart feels so full right now. I am excited about what the Lord is doing and will continue to do in my life. How wonderful that He doesn't give up on me but is ever faithful to orchestrate events in my life in such as way that they drive me to His feet. He is an awesome God who thinks nothing but good thoughts toward His children, and truly, my times are in HIS hands. How comforting this is! :o)

Wow. Has it really been so long since I last posted?

Things are going quite well for me! In general, it feels like the Lord has been teaching me SO much, I think especially through life's events.

The last two weeks have been incredibly busy, in a good way. They have flown by because I've been working on projects. One is a 2,000-2,500 article about our radio ministry at GFA. I'll try to post the link in a few months when the article comes out in SEND!. I've SO much enjoyed working on these articles. :O)

And now it's the weekend and I plan to,
A) Continue working on another article that I just received feedback and edits back on, and
B) Do stuff around the apartment, and
C) Help my friend and co-worker Christine, as we colabor together in our free garden plots :o)
D) Hang out with my Sunday school class. Tonight us gals are getting together and someone's gonna put make-up on us. That should be interesting since I virtually NEVER wear make-up. :oD I can't wait to hang out and have girl time, though! Then tomorrow night, a group of us (everyone who can make it) will go eat supper together and go to this game place ... I hear it has laser tag. I've never played laser tag but often have thought it sounded like fun!

Beautiful weather yet again.

It's been a good week! I've been eating healthier and can noticed the difference.

And I've had a number of things I've been working on, and have really been enjoying that.

I can't BELIEVE how fast this week has passed; it's truly flown by.

Well, I'm going to go and enjoy being out in this pretty weather for a little bit before prayer meeting tonight. :o)

It is beautiful out there.

Tomorrow after I go to the chiropractor in the morning (we're off for Good Friday!) I will be scouting out parks in that area for my S.S. class to go to soon. That should be fun! I'll be sure to bring my tennis shoes so I can go walking. :o)

That night will be the Good Friday service at church, and then going to eat (hopefully at California Pizza Kitchen, but whereever we go it will be a nice time!) with my S.S. class afterwards.

Looking forward to that.

It was a good weekend.

Had lots of fun hanging out with my Sunday school class. How thankful I am for them! :c)

And I felt like the Lord used different events to bring me out of a hard time of spiritual dryness. Sunday night, driving home from a meeting with other full-time missionaries from the church, I prayed for some of the needs they had mentioned, as well as bringing some other things before the Lord. It was encouraging to fellowship with them and hear just a little of how the Lord is working in other parts of the world!

Yesterday morning when I came back to the office, I felt alive again. Refreshed. Renewed. I felt close to the Lord during our time of worship and prayer before work.

Today? I don't feel so refreshed. And in some ways I feel rather challenged. Just further proof of how desperately I need Him. He is the source for abundant life. I so much need to stay close to Him, moment by moment, day by day. Oh, Jesus, help me to this end, I pray!!

Now I plan to go home and spend some time with the Lord before tonight's prayer meeting. I also want to go over my lesson. I plan to share about children in India.

WOW. It's shaping up to be another beautiful weekend.

Blue skies, nice puffy clouds, warm and sunny ... need I say more? :o)

The Lord has been blessing us with such gorgeous weekends!

I had a good afternoon. Worked on quite a bit of correspondence with ministry supporters and staff, wrote Monday's web story, and did a few other "odds and ends" type things. It felt good to get those things done -- and it was mostly fun as well! :o)

It's refreshing to get back to posting after a long absence. Boy, I didn't even realize it'd been two weeks already?! How times passes! Of course, not having internet access at home makes it a little more challenging to write quite as often in here.

Tonight five or six of us from my S.S. class will be hanging out at someone's house and watching a movie. She's ordering pizza for us! She decided that if someone would come and fix her sound system, she would treat everyone to pizza. :oD

Tomorrow? More meeting up with friends, both from S.S. class and from work. And hopefully a nice, long walk in there somewhere. It's shaping up to be a nice weekend.

It's Friday.

And I'm glad. :o) Don't get me wrong -- I LOVE my job! In a big way, it's a dream come true.

But I do also so much look forward to weekends and the chance to relax, catch up on stuff around the apartment, etc. For one thing, I have a stack of newsletters I need to get ready for supporters. :o) Usually I'm able to work on that during the week, but this week has been loaded with projects. That's a good thing, though -- I like projects. :oD

It was really cool to see how the Lord went before me the other night on one. He reminded me of Gretcha and how she would be great to write about for this church-planting article. This morning some supporters had just gotten back from the field and were sharing with our staff.

One related the spiritual darkness there. They told of stepping off the airplane and seeing the rows of men lined up to give rides. They could totally see the emptiness and darkness in their eyes. In contrast, at the very end of the line were some GFA leaders. Their faces were radiant with the love of Jesus. What a privilege that we can be a part of bringing that love to people like Gretcha. She lives in poverty but yet is so joyful because of Jesus! Yet there are still so many to be reached.

Well, I'm going home soon. Have a blessed weekend!

Whew! Busy day and I'm still at the office. I don't really mind, though!

Just I was frustrated earlier when I couldn't seem to get a breakthrough in this one project I was working on. But it's completed and turned in. YAY! Now there's another project to work on. I'm looking forward to it. :o) I like projects! I'll be working on it for a while tonight and will hopefully make some good progress. I'd like to have a rough draft by the end of the evening, especially since it was due yesterday. :oD

Today has been such a good day. The Lord did something wonderful -- something that I have been praying for. I feel so encouraged. He is doing great things in my life and teaching me so much. It really helps to put the intensity of the battle into perspective -- it's worth it to me if I come through on the other side and can see how He is shaping me to be more like Him. His love -- and the love and grace He pours out to me through His people -- are mind boggling.

My left shoulder and lower neck area hurt quite a bit this afternoon. Not fun. It's feeling better now, though.

I think it's been a while since I've had a resident walker update! (You know -- the guy that enjoys walking by our building. We don't mind -- in fact, it's fun to watch -- we can practically tell time by his walks, they are often so regular! :o))

So here goes ...

I was taking a walk -- so was the resident walker! He waved in a very friendly manner from across the street, cupped his hands over his mouth, and bellowed out, "Beautiful day out, isn't it?!" I yelled back, "Yes, it's gorgeous!" He gave thumbs up signs with both hands, which I returned. Then he got out his keys and proceeded to enter the side of his building, and I continued on my walk. This all happened about 1:35 this afternoon.

We will continue to bring coverage of our resident walker as we remember.

On a more serious note, life has been going relatively well, and I feel like the Lord has really done a work in my heart. There are still things that don't make sense to me, but I am so thankful for how HE has been shaping me to have more of His perspective.

What a beautiful day.

I slept in today -- but not on purpose. I was pretty bummed out when I woke up and saw the light streaming in and then realized I'd missed Sunday school and the church service was about to start! :o( (My alarm was set but I never heard it go off?! Strange?!)

Despite that, I've had a very nice day! I met up with my S.S. class to eat at The Cornery Bakery after church got out. Soon after that, I headed out to the park and met up with a group of other young people at the ministry to play sand volleyball! That was such a blast. :o) We'll have to do that more often!

I brought Web Dog -- figured he would enjoy the fresh air. And I sure enjoyed driving him around with his big head and smiling face hanging out the passenger's side window, and seeing the really fun, surprised looks on people's faces. :o)

After we played bunches of sand volleyball (so much fun!), I went home and put on my tennies (sand volleyball is best with bare feet so I wore sandals there :o)), I went walking at the nice concrete trail down the street. There were quite a few people out there enjoying the beautiful day.

The weekend has been so very nice.

Wow.

Today was such a good day.

I needed that. :o) Or, at least, felt like I did! I am so thankful ... yet at the same time am trying to take each moment as it comes -- to take things in even stride and be prepared for whatever the next moment holds, whether good or bad.

It's good to be here. It's good to be alive. I'm so glad to have had a nice day after kind of a rough week, and at the same time I don't want to forget or waver in the things the Lord is teaching me.

Looking forward to the weekend.

Encouraging breakthroughs.

As I was driving last night to church, listening to a message shared by our ministry's president, the Lord gave me a breakthrough!

I was powerfully reminded that I can will (deliberately choose) to look at my hard times from the Lord's perspective and not let them faze me, even when my heart and emotions cry out otherwise. I want to be able to say like the Apostle Paul, "None of these things move me."

A devotional I read the other day mentioned an interesting fact -- The Apostle Paul said "None of these things move me." He never said "None of these things hurt me." He hurt deeply. Yet he had such an incredible perspective.

In my weak human flesh I would love for all suffering and struggle to come to an end tomorrow. No, today. : ) Yet I am learning one step at a time to seek His contentment and perspective for however long He chooses to have me go through such things.

And I am having a nice afternoon and feeling encouraged. So thankful for that! :o)

Rough times.

I really need to feel Jesus' arms around me. To know that He is here with me, holding Me. Of course I realize that on a purely objective level. How much harder it can be to feel that on a heart level -- especially in the valleys. Truly He loves His children SO much, though.

I have had little moments of feeling to some measure that He is carrying me. Last night He gave me a neat devotional from Streams in the Desert. Someone wrote of a dream involving three women. They all were praying. The first woman received tender words of love from her Savior as He walked by. The second woman received a pat of approval. The third? Nothing -- He simply passed her by.

As the story goes as told in the devotional, the Lord came to the person having the dream and explained that, contrary to what they were thinking, the third woman--the one He seemed to ignore--had not grieved Him. Rather, she had the deepest faith to where she could handle the silence -- "I am training her through quick and drastic ways for the highest and holiest of service. She knows Me so intimately, and trusts Me so completely, that she no longer depends on outward signs to know of My approval. She is not dismayed or discouraged by any circumstances I arrange for her to encounter. She trusts Me when common sense, reason, and even every subtle instinct of the natural heart would rebel, knowing that I am preparing her for eternity, and realizing that the understanding of what I do will come later."

That was reassuring to me as I thought of how these hard times and struggles are not necessarily a bad sign -- but rather evidence that I have grown in my Christian walk. At the same time, too, though, I found myself saying, "Lord! I am not worthy. I do not have the strength. Give me the feeling that Your arms are around me, carrying me."

(There are many more good devotions in Streams in the Desert about trials. I'll try to write some more in here soon.)

Whew! Almost another whole week has gone by, and not another posting from me. :o) I will try to do better next time, I promise? :oD It is kinda challenging, though, when the only computer I am able to post from now is at work.

Today is actually my first day back in the office after being sick Thursday and Friday of last week. And throughout the weekend. Though I don't look or sound quite my usual self, I feel SO much better today. What a nice feeling. :o)

It was SO good to see somewhere else other than the walls of my apartment. Don't get my wrong -- I love my apartment -- It's just, it is awfully nice to be able to finally get out again. ;oD To celebrate, for lunch I used one of my Chick-fila coupons for free chicken soup, and even got some waffle fries (and a Coke) to go with. :o)

Anyhow -- It truly does feel like the enemy has been attacking me in quite a few ways lately. Physically, in my thought life, spiritually, etc. Yet it is kind of comforting -- If I weren't headed in the right direction, he wouldn't bother trying to discourage me.

I was kind of sad I had to miss the Superbowl with my S.S. class yesterday. I had planned to go, but of course got sick. Yet I knew by faith that the Lord had to have a purpose in it. Saturday night I was reading in Psalm 84 and having some sweet time with the Lord. What a refreshing breeze in the middle of a spiritual dry spell!

It's incredible how the Lord does it -- I felt it on my heart to write something in my journal about nesting in Him (from Psalm 84). Of course, due to a combination of being sick, tired and just plain lazy, I didn't at first get up to go to the other side of the room and retrieve the aforesaid journal. But when I wanted to go to the kitchen for more food, I decided to also detour into the living room to grab the journal. And would you know? I never did get around to journaling about nesting -- but I journaled about a gazillion other things. As I read my last journal entry, from December 2004, I was reminded of something really encouraging the Lord had done in my life--of His provision. So I thanked Him for that and, well, you get the picture. :o) It was a refreshing and renewing time.

Well, I've been back in Texas for about a week now, and still trying to figure out how to get "back into the swing of things" -- or maybe "into the swing of things" in the first place? :o) Do you ever feel like you don't have enough time to do everything in your life that you would like to or needs to be done? I feel that way much of the time. LOL.

I think a big thing is priorities. Putting first those jewels--the things that are most important and needed. Then focus and discipline in spending my time more wisely. This past weekend in my Sunday school class, I was convicted of my need to be much more consistent in my times with the Lord. So, taking the advice our teacher gave us, I set appointments with the Lord. I must admit the first one was set rather tentatively, especially as I'm not a morning person in any shape or form. :o)

But sure enough, I popped out of bed and shuffled over to the living room at 6:50 yesterday morning -- then at 7:30 this morning. I didn't necessarily "feel" like I was in the Lord's presence, but seeking Him diligently is so much more than just a feeling--the feelings won't always come right away, but yet perseverance in seeking is so important. Oh, how I long to be so close to Him--to spend much time in His wonderful presence, just resting at His feet.

I catch glimpses of what that is like--I want it to be a constant in my life. Each day. Each moment. Through Him it is possible.

This was the last night of the conference. It is nice to be back home resting, but in a way it is sad that tonight was the last night. Even though busy at times, it has been a nice and refreshing past few days.

I have truly enjoyed getting to know the other missionaries--especially the dear, sweet couple who seem to have "adopted" me. :o) I have their email address and plan to keep in touch with them.

And I feel the Lord answered our prayers for tonight -- hearts seemed to be touched; I even had someone ask me how to give for tsunami relief. Yippee! :o) I've decided that in many ways there is just about nothing that thrills me more than getting to share with God's people what He is doing on behalf of those who have never heard His name. It is so encouraging to me when people want to be a part of that work.

The last several days have been a blur of yummy food, speaking engagements, fellowship, things to prepare for the children, yummy food, listening to other missionaries share, and more yummy food.

We have had luncheons and suppers. Now, we only have one session left -- a potluck supper tomorrow night, followed by a closing ceremony I have the privilege to share at. In a way, I'm sad it will be over.

It sure has been a nice time. There has been one missionary couple in particular that I have so much enjoyed getting to know better. They are really sweet and encouraging. So of course I wanted to sit by them at lunch yesterday. I have kind of "adopted" them. :o)

Yesterday I shared at the lunch program, and I think it went very well. Of course, that was the Lord! I was thrilled when a lady came up to me with $4 she and a friend had gathered between them -- She wanted it to go for Gospel tracts and said she wished it were more. I told her it meant 1,000 people hearing the Gospel and she was happy. : )

I was thinking again yesterday how there's nothing like getting to be with God's people, sharing about the work of His kingdom. It's one of the best feelings! I pray the Lord will touch hearts during tomorrow night's session -- and that I won't be nervous as I'm not naturally a public speaker -- and that there will be much fruit for the harvest. :o)

Today I had one of those moments where everything stops.

For the conference at my home church this coming week, I will be sharing several times with the "grown-ups" and children. My mom had the idea that I could have pictures of children from SEND! magazine on a posterboard, as a visual.

When I saw one of the pictures, the whole world seemed to stand still. I started to cry. It was a small picture of three little children --the youngest couldn't be more than 3 or 4 -- with round cheeks and big brown eyes. But what jumped out to me were the sweet (but in a way somber) looks on their faces and their mismatched, disproportionate clothes. I felt in a way that my heart was breaking for these precious children.

Even when I went back to the posterboard and looked at the picture again, I felt sad all over again for these little ones. Though it can be a little painful in a sense, I am so thankful for moments like these -- They show me that my heart isn't too hard yet -- that the Lord is giving me, even if in ever the tiniest measure, a piece of His heart and burden for a lost and perishing world.

Now I am about to get ready so I can attend a missions fellowship supper with my parents. But I know I won't soon forget what happened today.

Okay, so I haven't written here in a while. Guess I've been being a goober. :o) Nah, really, things truly have been quite busy ... been working on many writing projects related to the tsunami ... not to mention preparing for when I will be sharing at my home church missions conference. I am so thankful --the Lord has really been going before me these past couple days and giving me much grace -- I feel like things are beginning to come together for the conference, in a relatively short amount of time.

I haven't felt up to much these past couple weeks -- shoulder and neck pain off and on, and been unusually tired. But ... these past couple days, overall I haven't really had much pain at all and have felt pretty well physically -- and today I've had so much more energy than I've probably had at any other point in the past week or so. Very thankful for that!

I feel bombarded by the attack of the enemy (Ephesians 6) --but, yet, so encouraged at how the Lord is helping me in amazing ways as I prepare -- And excited about what He is going to do. I truly believe that the fact I have encountered so much spiritual warfare lately means He is going to move in incredible ways. Truly, what a privilege to be rendered His ambassador -- to beseech and encourage others to be a part of reaching precious souls on the other side of the world. Thank You, Lord. I so much don't deserve it.

I had an incredible moment as I was walking and praying just now. It felt like it was just me and the Lord -- nothing else mattered but Him. My circumstances, my desires, my uncertainties -- none of that mattered at that moment. It's all about Him. He is so good to us! We can trust Him. It was a wonderful moment, one that I don't want to forget. (The peace I felt was immense.) And I want to live that way throughout this year! Truly we can rest in Him. He is our dwelling place, our Rock. Thank You, Lord.