I did a triatholon after work today. It was quite fun! Well, the most fun was the swimming part by far. First I walked a mile at a nearby nature trail. The weather was nice and cool. So pleasant!

Then I did 25 minutes on the treadmill at my apartment's fitness room. Then I swam for 30 minutes. A nice time!

I also spent an hour with the Lord. It was good! I would like to consistently spend an average of an hour with the Lord each day. This week, so far so good ... I would like to get to where spending time with Him is just like breathing -- something I don't even need to think about, but just naturally do.

I had some nice time with the Lord before lunch today. As I was singing and thinking of how I've experience some times of wonderful worship with the body of Christ, I was excited to think of how that's what Heaven will be like--except infinitely better. What an incredible thought.

This afternoon I was looking at some photos from the field and thought of the stories behind some of the various ones. I looked into the faces of desperation--men and women whose eyes told the despair they felt. A despair none but the living God can take away! On the other side, imagine with me the joy someone experiences when they hear for the first time of a loving God and Jesus who saves--after having spent their lives in bondage to angry, unresponsive deities. This, too, was reflected in many of the photos. Pictures of men and women earnestly worshipping Almighty God, their faces uplifted toward Him. It brought back memories of my experience in India--how the way they worshipped, you would think it was only them (each individual person, for instance) and Jesus in the small, concrete one-room church. I had never seen worship quite like that! Amazing.

It is my heart's desire that ALL come to know and worship the true and living God. That ALL experience the joy of a relationship with Him. So often I think of my grandmother who still needs Jesus. And tonight I got to witness to the cashier at a nearby drugstore. I had to stop by after prayer meeting to pick up a cassette tape for when I record an interview with a staff member. He remarked that every time I come in there, I'm always joyful. I said, "Praise the Lord" and told him it wasn't me, but the Lord--that I am a Christian and have a relationship with Jesus, and I would like everyone to know Him. I asked him if he knows Jesus. He said he does. (I find many people around here will say that to you when asked, but it's hard to say for sure whether they truly do.) I asked if he had trusted in Jesus to save him. He said he had a long time ago. (But it didn't sound like he considers it a part of his everyday life now? Hard to say positively...) I told him that Jesus is always there for us to come to him. Please stand in the gap in prayer for this young man. I hope I wasn't too bold in my witnessing. My desire (as well as for each time I witness to anyone) is that the Lord would filter out anything that was not of Him--and that this individual would just see Jesus and would think about the short conversation we had, in view of eternity.

Yesterday was a hard day. Saturday night as I was walking, it appeared that the Lord gave me a piece of His perspective on the unspoken I had sought His wisdom on the night before. And I knew it wouldn't be the easiest to live with that perspective because of a good thing (in some ways) that I would need to give up.

But the day was primarily hard because it felt like I was reaching out for the Lord, so desperately longing to experience His love on a heart level, but not getting there. I know He loves me--but knowing objectively and feeling it in your heart are two different things.

Today was nice--so much better than yesterday. I had lunch with a coworker, and we had a good time of fellowship and sharing about the things the Lord has called us to in the ministry. Then tonight I spent nearly an hour with the Lord. I am so thankful for that. At the same time, it seemed to take so much energy out of me. I think perhaps partly because of the battle we're in. And partly perhaps because I was tired. With that note, I think I'll go to bed now. :o) I'm so thankful for the good day the Lord gave me today!

Ever feel like you need heart surgery? Nope, I'm not talking about surgery for your physical heart--though surely many have needed that. Instead, I'm talking about your spiritual heart.

Tonight walking around my complex, I sensed the Lord revealing something in my heart--a perspective I had for a little bit--that in many ways I totally hadn't realized until that moment. It was a good thing--even if hard in some ways. How fragile we are in our fallen humanity--how prone to wander. I was a little sad as I reflected on my folly--my warped perspective. But oh, what a precious dialogue it was with the Lord.

I have emerged with a strong desire to be passionately in love with Him--to love Him so much that I am engulfed in His presense and everything else, good or bad, just fades away. Boy am I glad the Father is so patient with me. It seems like I would've given up on myself long ago. ;o) It's sure been encouraging to experience His working in my life. Philippians 2:13: "For it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure."

Well I'm tired. Even though we all left a little early from Six Flags, it felt like a full day. I think we were ALL tired by the time we pulled off to go to Steak 'n Shake (our tradition!). ;o) Maybe the rather muggy weather had something to do with it. And you KNOW it's muggy if this Mississippi gal says it is. :o)

Tomorrow a big group of us crazy season pass holders will be taking another trip to Six Flags. :o) I can't wait! It will be a nice end to the week. Great fun and fellowship!

I need a sensitive and discerning heart to hear the Lord's voice about something. In my spirit I want to know (and I have begun asking to know), but in my flesh I don't because I'm afraid it will be something I don't want to hear. ;o) Indeed I am reminded of the statement Jesus made in the Garden of Gethsamene--"The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak." Thankfully, I have been at peace. Now I just need to hear His voice clearly and have His discipline to follow even if it's hard.

I am so thankful for the Lord -- Truly He is so good to me. (And it is so worth it to follow Him.) Oh that I would sense that on a heart level not only in the good times (like now), but also in the bad. I know it on an objective, intellectual level in those times, of course, but it can be pretty hard for it to travel down to my heart during those seasons. ; )

Two moving parties in one week.

Remember how we moved someone in on Monday? Well tonight, three days later, we all got together to help someone move out.

My team leader and his family. They love us (and we love them!!!) but have been sensing the Lord calling them to something else for this season in their lives.

Hard to believe still. I walked in his office today after he left with all the guys for one last meal together at their favorite spot. And it was pretty much empty. I felt like it began to hit me then. I cried just a little.

Yet I am content and have a settled peace about this. No matter what, I know the Lord will take care of us--and them! The desire of my heart is that the progress of the website as a tool for reaching the lost of Asia be in no way lessened throughout this--that the Lord's hand be upon it and we each be able to take up the slack.

And it also sounds like the Lord will be bringing someone else to join us soon. I don't know who ... but someone! Though for sure he will be missed--he was a dear brother, a competent leader and a humble, dedicated servant. I am so thankful for the chance to have gotten to know this family.

We got to help move a new staff couple and their 9-year-old son in today. That was fun! They're so nice! :o) I have been looking forward to their coming ever since they were here for their interview week.

Other than that, not much going on. Tomorrow I am meeting to catch up with friends for lunch (either at Chick-fila with our free food coupons or something like Wendy's 99-cent menu :o))--and Wednesday a really big group of us are going on what we affectionately refer to as the "Chinese Lunch Club". :o) It's been a while since we've done that, and I look forward to the fellowship (and yummy food!). Then Thursday I'm going to lunch with three friends for our monthly lunch together. It would usually be next week, but we moved it up--It's been two months since we were all together, and we miss it! ;o)

I'm looking forward to the fun and fellowship!

Tonight some buddies and I engaged in an all-out fight (okay, so not THAT bad) with crumpled pieces of straw. :o) Quite fun, I might add. The occasion? Suzi's 21st B-day, celebrated by a group outing to Braum's for ice cream.

Well that's about all I have to say tonight ... except, please pray about an unspoken, for Jesus to comfort me and give me peace and His perspective. Thank you! Love ya'll.

Whew! You sure get a good workout on that bike in our apartment complex fitness room. I don't really have much to write about tonight, but I just got to thinking lately, can you believe I've already been blogging for almost a year? Wow! It sure has passed fast.

Tonight I was feeling a little weary and scattered. But then I spent some time with the Lord and in prayer. Oh, how that ministered to my spirit. Thank You, Dear Jesus. There's nothing like Your peace. And ... isn't it incredible that though we are wretched sinners, Jesus died for us? He is All-Sufficient in the Trinity and lacking nothing; yet He loved us so much (and still does!) He would rather die for us than live without us. Incredible. What wondrous love is this! O, that everyone would know that divine love!

P.S. Tomorrow my friend (and roommate!) Tara and I are meeting up after work to eat at McAlisters Deli and go see Two Brothers at the dollar theater. I'm looking forward to the fun and fellowship. :o)

Wow. I retreated into the prayer room at 10:15 and spent time with Jesus until after 11:00, when my roommate got home and came in so we could pray together. I had gone in at 10:15 thinking, 'oh, I really should spend some time with the Lord today' but thinking it would end up being just a few minutes on this particular occasion. Little did I know ... Trust me, I'm NOT complaining. :o) It was such a refreshing time. Truly, there's nothing like sitting in His wonderful presence. I love Him so much! He is so good to me. I am sensing that perhaps He is putting ways on my heart that He would have me serve within the ministry. It's an exciting thing! At the same time, if His plans for me are to continue doing exactly what I am doing right now, I will be very content and happy with that. I consider it such a privilege that I am getting to write stories to encourage people to pray. It is an incredible thing; I am thrilled to get to be a voice for 14,000 native missionaries reaching their people on the other side of the world. I am so thankful the Lord in His undeserved merit upon me has given me this privilege. I want to be available for HOWEVER He would want to use me. I want to be His willing vessel, with nothing in me that would hinder the fulfillment of His eternal purposes through me.

Please pray for me.

I can't begin to express how encouraging today was. A good friend at work shared during staff prayer this morning about an incredible breakthrough in her mom's life last night. Well, last night the Lord put it on my heart to pray John 10:27,28 for her mom. Needless to say, I was on cloud nine. A little while into the workday, I found myself writing this email to my friend:

I can't begin to tell you how encouraged I was to hear your PTL about your mom. There's something I've GOT to tell you ...

I went on to ask if we could meet for lunch sometime. I didn't expect it would be today! A few minutes later, I received a reply asking, Could I go then? Of course I wrote back, YES! Probably 10 or 15 minutes later, I was sitting at a booth at Wendy's, telling her my story. Then she went on to relate other incredible events in her life that the Lord had orchestrated. What a wonderful time of sharing it was.

Also today, a coworker brought me feedback from a friend of the ministry who had been praying with her daughter for the release of the missionaries taken hostage last week. And she was overjoyed that the Lord provided for their release. And I got to thinking ... WOW. I was a part of that. Praise God. What a privilege! I forwarded it to the rest of the web team as encouragement to all of us that our labor is not in vain. Every keystroke, every phone call, every note written--every single bit of it is playing a significant role in advancing His kingdom in Asia.

There's so much more I could tell about today ... good things that happened, but for now it will suffice to say that after a postcard party where we wrote ministry supporters and then fellowshipped together over pizza, I went upstairs to finish "tweaking" a web update for tomorrow and then found myself walking outside in the nice evening breeze, rejoicing in the incredible privilege to be used in such a way.

How could I do anything else in life?

Tonight was so refreshing. I so much was reminded of God's goodness to me. Oh, how I needed that. Thank You, Lord. I love You. We aren't promised the way will be easy ... but we do know He will be with us every step of the journey. Amen! Hallelujah.

This is an excerpt from a prayer I wrote in my journal after I got up this morning:

Oh Lord, I believe You are so merciful that You are deliberately orchestrating my circumstances lately in such a way that I am driven to utter dependence on You and compelled to give up the "non-essentials". What I am going through is painful, but, oh, the end result, how glorious! Thank You, Lord. For loving me so much that You won't give up on me and dismiss me to my vain and selfish pursuits. Help me become more like You EACH DAY, Dear Jesus.

When I went walking yesterday after work, the Lord gave me such a good conversation with a lady I met on the trail. I was amazed at how God totally orchestrated it ... In response to something she asked me, I told her how my roommate and I had just got done praying together. She said, "That's interesting that you mention that, because I was walking around here earlier and seeing the fireflies and thinking, 'this is almost a spiritual experience.'" So that opened the door for me to ask her where she is spiritually, what she believes. We had such a good talk; I was able to bring out several times how Jesus is the only way. She said it wasn't by coincidence that we met--that she usually walks in the mornings ... AND that earlier that day she had been missing her deceased parents. She seemed so encouraged by our time together. Needless to say, I was kind of on cloud nine after our conversation. :o) Please pray for her and her family, that Jesus would become very real to them.

As for me? I'm doing okay. A little tired. One of our brothers on staff shared with us during prayer meeting this morning. He talked about the battle and how many have been struggling. I'm glad to know I'm not the only one. He mentioned a conversation he and his wife had (a few weeks back?). They each asked a serious question -- Am I willing to pay the price in order that billions could have the opportunity to know Christ? He shared how choosing to pay the price is a choice we must make. It was encouraging to me to hear that others are also struggling in the battle. One day it will all be worth it! It's worth it now; we just don't see the end result yet. Only what is eternal will truly matter. Yet it can be so easy to forget that in the "here and now".

Okay, it's another gorgeous day out there. Yay! :o) Thank You, Lord. It would be nice to just happen to have a road trip planned on a day like this. I left work a little early to make a much-needed bank deposit and grab some cheap food at Burger King. Today I didn't have lunch because I was working on a very urgent story for www.gfa.org. (Be sure to check it out so you can be praying!!) But I'm not complaining. Truly it is such a privilege to serve on behalf of these missionaries who are persecuted and in need of our prayers. As God's people all around the world have prayed, miracles have happened time and time again. People in captivity have been released or escaped. It's incredible! Praise the Lord.

I cried a little this afternoon. I know that humanly I don't have the strength or grace to handle what the Lord has allowed to come my way. (But HE does!) But tonight was nice -- Riding with Cindi and Jean, two good friends from work, in a convertible with the top down, on a beautiful night. :o) We were going to the Cheesecake Factory for a special birthday treat (for me). It was fun and we had some good laughs. I teased that the three of us are dangerous together. :o) (Watch out world, here we come!)

I had the Godiva chocolate cheesecake. Quite rich! Needless to say, I have plenty in a "to-go" box; I plan to partake of it throughout the week. :o) Last night at our prayer meeting we all had the opportunity to say encouraging things to each other. I was really ministered to by the things people said to me -- Many mentioned they were encouraged by my happiness, and some told me they appreciated my devotion to the Lord. Truly I am touched by the family here -- so many caring people that appreciate me and are kind to me.

Later this week I get to catch up with my good friend Jen, and early next week I'm having lunch with a really nice volunteer who used to be on staff with us. I really enjoy talking to her. She mentioned she wanted to get to know me better. Well, the feeling is mutual. :o) I'm looking forward to us chatting next week and having some special time together.

Last night and this morning I was missing my college town and the beloved church I attended there. And on another note, I was reminded of the thing the Lord has allowed--somehow in His infinite wisdom--that hasn't been easy. O Lord, help me be the person I need to be in this. Grant me YOUR perspective, I pray. If I am honest, in my finite, "tainted-with-sin" human perspective I would find it so much easier if the situation were nonexistent. (I realize the Lord has so much He can teach me through this, but so many times I don't see the visible fruit. I just need to seek His perspective and then trust by faith that the fruit is there.)

Yet as I drove my friend and roommate Tara to pick up her car and we talked about what a gorgeous day it was, I found myself looking eagerly outside and saying, "God is good. He is in control! I can trust Him." What a comforting thought! Hallelujah! :o) I love You, Lord. Have Your way in me, I pray. Fill me with Your grace and love.

I'm back from housesitting. And now I'm planning to go walking on the trail close to my apartment and enjoy that gorgeous weather. :o)

Yesterday morning the cat woke me up. Well, I had gotten up to put my clothes in the dryer and then thought I'd catch a few more ZZZZZ's. Would've been asleep for longer though, I'd imagine. ;o) I'm so not a morning person but am trying to be. ANYHOW, the cat started meowing to be given attention. I could tell it couldn't wait to spend time with me. Then I was gripped as I thought about how that's how Jesus is with me--He can't WAIT to spend time with me. So I got up and had such a good time with Jesus. (Praise the Lord!) During lunch I had some good time with Him too.

Now, one day later, I find myself struggling for His perspective. To keep believing in faith and having a Christlike attitude about something He has allowed in my life for quite some time now, for reasons I probably won't fully know until Heaven. But oh, He is so good. His thoughts toward His children are good, and He can be trusted. Always. Thank You, Lord. I'm looking forward to the rest of this day. Well, gotta get back to the house and play with those cats. :o)

The other day an evangelist came and shared with us. He had some good witnessing tips. Even as we have the incredible privilege to reach people on the other side of the world, so many of whom have not heard the Gospel even once, we still also should be witnessing to others as the Lord brings opportunities our way. Yesterday one of these came about.

I was at Wal-mart getting my tires rotated and my battery changed. It took longer than it should have because the attendant forgot to change the battery, hence I had more time in the waiting room where I shared about the Lord with a man sitting in there. Though he claimed to be a Christian, it's hard to say whether he was. He seemed to be agreeing with a lot of things in a noncommittal, polite way. At first I hadn't talked to him about spiritual things and felt bad. I sure am glad the Lord is so gracious to give us second chances, especially to goobers like me. :o)

So anyhow, the Lord gave me the opportunity to talk with him as I would to a fellow Christian--talking about my personal perspective and how I want to bring people to Heaven with me. I shared about Jesus and weaved in Heaven and Hell as real places that people will go to.

On another note, yesterday I found out some dear friends of mine from my college church have signed their high school S.S. class up to support a native missionary. I can't begin to tell you how thrilled I was. :o) I wrote back today and related that they will never know this side of Heaven just how many lives the Lord will eternally impact on the other side of the world through them. What a privilege we have! Thank you, Lord. :o) Oh, that Your wonderful Gospel of Your kindness and mercy would penetrate the hearts of each person in the 10/40 Window.