Another nice day. :o) For lunch, I met up with three coworkers to eat at Chick-fila with some coupons I had. We had a good time together! Especially interesting was the discussion about finding the balance where we both are content and joyful in the situation God has us, but yet have faith and hope that He is able to change it.

After lunch I went to a coworker's home to pick up a table and chairs they had offered me with the coffee table. The chairs will work great for my dining room table until I can find a full set! And the table will be cute with a tablecloth as an end table in my living room. Tonight I had fun arranging a lamp, picture frames, a magazine and a journal on my coffee table and end table. It's fun seeing how it's all coming together. Now I just need a sofa. :o) Hmmm ... oh, AND a dresser.

Tonight was such a fun, relaxing evening. After I cleaned "my" bathroom for the week at work and helped clean the building (my month), I went to Great Clips to get my hair cut. $6.99 coupon--You can hardly beat that. :o) The lady I had is from India, so I got to tell her how I'd gone there in March. (still hard to believe!) I continue to be reminded of incredible things I experienced and learned there. I thank God for bringing these things to mind! After getting my hair cut I spontaneously decided to catch a movie at the dollar theater--13 Going On 30. It was so cute--and overall pretty clean! Definitely a chick flick, as I was telling someone later. :o) Anyhow, after I grabbed (a really late) supper (with another coupon!) I went driving (it was such a pretty night!) and sang praise songs and prayed. All in all, it was a nice night.

Yet another nice day! Had time with the Lord again at lunch break. Early this evening I went walking down the road at the nature preserve. The weather was so nice! Had to be in the 60's. Highly unusual for Texas this time of the year. :o)

A coworker brought over a coffee table I bought from him and his wife for a really good deal. It's cute! Cherry finish with drawers that pull out. It will go in my new apartment that I'm moving into around December, along with a wood dining room table someone was giving away. :o) And my bed was given to me, too, and I bought my computer desk/chair for a grand total of $13. It's been kind of fun to see how the Lord has provided, especially since I had NO furniture whatsoever when I came down. Unless you count my small purple lamp and two crates my sister painted for me, that I used as a nightstand. :o)

Another good day. Had some nice time with the Lord during lunch break. There's nothing like being in His presence!

Tonight we had pizza and then watched a movie together. The movie was Miracle. We watched it as a staff body, to get applications--such as being united together for one common purpose, with nobody any more important than anyone else. In the movie, it was to win an olympic hockey game. For us, it hit home when our beloved leader talked about the potential for SO many people on the field to turn to Christ. Think of it--in dying to our own selfish ambitions and radically abandoning ourselves to the cause of Christ, ultimately we have nothing to lose--and everything to gain. If athletes here on this earth endure pain and die to desires that they may win a crown that perishes, how much more should we do the same, for an incorruptible crown?

Wow, today was such a good day! I had some sweet time with the Lord during my lunch break. He is so good! I love Him so much. The rest of the day seemed to just naturally flow from that time with Him. I wrote a persecution story for our website, and it seemed the words came easily. Thank You, Lord. You gave me the words!

I stayed at the office until close to 7:00, then came home and ate some turkey spaghetti I'd made. Then I went walking. When I got back, my roommate and I prayed and I started some laundry. I hope tomorrow is just as good as today! :o) Or even better.

I feel in some aspects like I've been going through the valley. And I don't know what to do to get out of it. Maybe I'm not supposed to be out of it. Maybe I'm to endure through more of the valley, that I may become more like my Savior through it. If so, I can say by faith--even if not always emotionally--"Blessed be His name."

I did have some special times today of sensing His presence. When I was in church and they were singing "Better is One Day", He felt so close! After church I did a prayer walk in a neighborhood across the street. That was a neat time. And my friend Lindy and I chatted and prayed together. That was such a sweet time of fellowship! Thank You, Lord.

My friend from back home, Heather, and I talked for two hours tonight, reminiscing about times we had not long after we first met--and wondering what our Bible study buddies are up to now.

You know what? It seems that just as the Lord has miraculously intervened in a situation I've been faced with, a different one has become harder. But (by faith) praise God! I can trust Him. This can be material for sacrifice. I ask to be made more like Him and than am surprised when He actually seeks to answer my prayer, by bringing adversity into my life.

Tomorrow is church. YAY! I like my church here--although I also miss my church back home (college town) and can't wait to see them all again. :o)

The battle continues. (see August 1 entry) But God is good. And He is faithful. Tonight we had extended prayer at the ministry. My sore throat had gone away but returned for part of the evening. And I felt tired and warm on my forehead again. Yet I can pretty much tell I'm not sick, as in anything contagious. Pray for me! I think my biggest thing is I feel so worn out it's hard to focus to pray and read the Word, though I know that is so important! And I so much want to live more purposefully ... and to be rid of "ME". How selfish and silly we (I!) can be. Oh, Jesus, make me more like YOU, I plead.

Tonight I visited one of my roommates at the house she now shares with three other girls ... well, okay, so young women. :o) The youngest, 18, arrives this Saturday. This Saturday is also a reception and pool party for a friend at the ministry who's graduating from high school. So it will be a full day!

Last night a group of us all went to Six Flags. (Did I ever tell you I'm REALLY enjoying my season pass? :o)) That was nice! The preteen sons of a family on staff got to join us; it was fun having them along. They're such sweet boys!

My throat was hurting today and my forehead was a little warm. I think it's allergies. I seem to be feeling a little better now. Life has been flying by in some ways! Tomorrow is a busy day--full day at work as usual, and then my friend Cara and I are catching up over supper at Arby's. Then I'll come home and rest and get some stuff done (hopefully) and then we have our monthly extended prayer night at the ministry! I'm looking forward to it. Lord, give me strength, I pray. :o) Amen.

During prayer meeting tonight, we were challenged to devote ourselves to prayer. I so much want to be a woman of prayer. The story was told of a brother in North India who prays 3 hours a day, 6 on Sundays. Wow. I want to be more like that! Please, Lord, help me. Tonight I prayed for 20 minutes when I got home. You've gotta start somewhere. :o)

I'm back. I am doing better tonight, although a little stressed still. Tonight after work one of my roommates, her sister and I went to a nearby town to pick up some kitchen stuff from a lady at her church and get a free (yummy!) sample at Krispy Kreme. We're actually not roommates anymore as of Saturday--she's the one who got moved into a four-bedroom house. But we were pulling out of work at the same time today, and, unknown to each other until later, were both thinking rather sadly of how we were now going in two different directions. The Lord has incredible plans for all of us roommates in this new season of our lives, though, and we can trust Him as we watch them unfold. It will be exciting to watch. :o)

Tomorrow is a web team lunch. Yay! And then tomorrow night is prayer meeting. Pray I won't be stressed out anymore. :o) Life is busy right now, but that's no reason I have to be stressed. I do realize we all go through those times, though. Generally I'm doing fine--somehow I've been kinda stressed these last few days, etc.

I did get to see my friend Rebecca. Or Becka, as she used to always go by. :o) And her brother James. He's sweet. It's hard to believe he's "all grown up" and 18 now. I think the last time I saw him he was 10 years old. I remember Becka and I taking him to a little fair with us one time. Her two children were with her, too. They're so cute and seem in general quite well-behaved. :o) They bounded up to me and kept wanting to sit by me!

Pray for me. Today I felt bombarded with feelings of condemnation. I was talking to someone else tonight who also faced this. I know that spiritual strongholds are being broken in Asia as we speak. Precious people are turning from spiritual bondage to their idols, to worshipping the living God and Him alone. Praise God for this. At the same time, the Enemy won't just sit by and watch this all happen.

There are times when we at the ministry face more spiritual attack than others, and I think this could be one of those times--especially since by God's grace we recently started our Bridge of Hope program to reach dear children who desperately need Jesus. Through Christ, all things are possible. John 15:13 says that greater is He who is in us. Amen! I love you, Lord. Thank You that You love me so much and can be trusted no matter what. :o)

Tomorrow I will likely get to see my best friend from junior high/high school. Yay! She's driving through on her way back from seeing her sis. We are meeting in a town about 30 miles from here, 22 miles from my church. She should be coming through around 2ish. So the plan is that I will go to the 12:00 service at my church, call her from their with my phone card and then head over that way to meet her at Applebee's. It will be nice to see her again after such a long time! I'll have to bring my camera and take pictures. :o)

I am so much seeing perspectives in my life that need to be changed. I think it all boils down to dying to my pride. At times it seems that every time I turn around, I see my own wretchedness. But that's a good thing, right? I mean, not that I'm wretched, but that the Lord is showing me how I am?

We moved one of my roommates into her house today. Well, I guess it would be more correct to say her stuff? She needed to go out of town this weekend and have some dental work done. My remaining roommate and I prayed together tonight and had a good talk about what we're doing as far as apartments. It looks like I will be moving pretty soon--likely August 25! I'm excited but also realizing this is a big step and in a sense "stepping out of my comfort zone"... though I'm very much sensing the Lord has orchestrated and directed this. I think in many ways the move will drive me to more dependence on Him. There is so much He is able to teach me if I'll just let Him. : )

A friend from work and I had fun running through the rain tonight! My roommate Dorinda was packing, and we all hung out. That was fun. Tonight it really hit me ... We're moving. Wow! Hard to believe.

We three roommates have been here together for almost two years. The Lord has taught us (and stretched us all!) a lot, and we've had some good fellowship. I hope we can remain good friends! At the same time I'm also looking forward to this new chapter in my life.

I think the Lord has put it on my heart to have a schedule of sorts--certain things I want to make time for, such as curling up with a good book, getting lots of cooking experience, prayer times, etc. I'm excited about it! PRAY for me that I would live purposefully ... that even though I will have my own apartment, I would not yield to the temptation to be selfish--to do things when I want to do them. Instead, I want to listen to the Spirit. Even as I say this, I know I am weak in my human flesh. But He is able!

Last night before going to bed (or was it this morning? can't remember?) I read Malachi 3:10, a verse that was quoted in my devotional. I actually didn't get any further than that verse! It's such a good truth, about how the Lord's blessings are available for His children as they yield to Him. That is my desire--that I will spend my time (and money) as He would have me to, trusting Him that He will abundantly minister to me and meet my needs. Praise God!  

Life has been good! We had an exciting story from the field recently. So, things have been busy in the web room, with our team leader and I working on articles and email subscriber feedback. It's incredible to see how the Lord answers prayer.

Tomorrow after work, my roommates and I are having dinner together. I'm looking forward to the food and fellowship. :o) One of my roommates is ordering a pizza online (cheaper that way I think!) and then I'm gonna pick it up. Talk about teamwork. :o) We all are also gonna discuss logistics and details of our upcoming moves--all in different directions. We've already decided we all want to continue our roommate dinners once a month. I'm glad for that!

Stop the press! Today I found a cute apartment for a GREAT price! I am moving into it on August 25. The story of how the Lord orchestrated everything is pretty cool. Long story made short, he totally lined up everything between us roommates, leadership here at the ministry, etc. There are still details that we all need to work out, but things are coming together.

Basically, we're all willing to do whatever the Lord would have--and what would be best for the ministry. I'm so excited! :o) The message tonight at our Sunday night fellowship was about living more and more purposefully, with eternity in mind. It was so good, and something I felt the Lord had already been putting on my heart, especially during this particular season of my life. Walking around our apartment complex later (it's been a beautiful day!) I dedicated my new place to the Lord.  

"Just five more minutes."

I found myself continually saying this as I played a game with my Bible study leader's 8-year-old daughter tonight at the coffee shop. :o) Of course, it turned into five or six more minutes, and on and on ... You get the picture. :o) It was fun! And Shari joined us. I just met her tonight and don't know whether she knows the Lord or not. Pray the Lord works in her heart! She's really nice.

Tomorrow my roommates and I are meeting up with a couple of coworkers to surprise one of them for her birthday. That will be fun! :o) Then I'm meeting up with my friend Lindi, who has taken a job in Utah. I will miss her! We have a special friendship and enjoy sharing about the Lord.

Wow, today has been such a good day! I got to fellowship with friends over lunch AND supper. I ran into another friend at the store, gave her a ride home, and hung out with her for a while. :o)

While I am aware that the "situation" is still there, it seems to have faded into the background for now. That's how it is for me a good amount of the time, though not the whole time. God is faithful and He knows what's best! I can trust Him.

There is a hard situation in my life that the Lord, for whatever reason, has seen fit to let go on in my life for a while now. Usually by His grace I'm able to stay pretty encouraged, but this afternoon I was crying ... I wasn't good for much at the office. ;o) By faith, tomorrow will be better!

I already feel so much better. A big group of us from the ministry went to Six Flags tonight (aren't season passes great? :o)) and I had a nice time! :o) On the way back, we girls were having a good talk about the Lord's timing--how it is perfect. We can trust Him! One thing my friend (and roommate) mentioned especially encouraged me. She said she was reading in A Tale of Three Kings about how some of David's times of deepest sorrow produced such beautiful words that still speak into the lives of so many. Praise God for that! How thankful I am--how comforting it is to know--that nothing I go through is by accident. It is all for a purpose. Amen.

The Lord continues to allow difficult situations to come my way. By faith I thank Him, for I know He thinks good thoughts toward me. His plan is best. I can trust Him. And He is chiseling away my impurities, so I can be a little more like Him each day. That doesn't mean it's easy, though.

Prayer meeting tonight was good! And a group of us were all invited to someone's house to fellowship afterwards. I kind of wanted to go, but was sooooooooo tired this evening. I had some good time with the Lord!

Tonight one of my roommates and I grocery shopped together and then went to her cousin's house to eat chocolate chip ice cream. :o) Now? I am going to bed. I think I hear my pillow calling my name?
 
I'm excited about the different things the Lord will continue to work on in my life as I seek Him. I am encouraged that He is helping me in my everyday life to recognize perspectives that I would like to change. And of course, I realize giving them over to Him is the only way they will change.
 
I find that the Lord has been faithful to bring situations my way lately (at the ministry) that, while not always the easiest, are means to drive me to my knees and cling to Him all the more. Praise God!
 
Maybe I will write more when I'm more awake. :o) Have a great night!  

Yesterday a group of us went to Six Flags with our season passes. I had a wonderful time! Not only did we all have some great talks and laughs, but the Lord arranged for me to meet a youth leader who got me in to a Q&A session with Steven Curtis Chapman, who was there in concert. Though I didn't get to meet the singer, I so much appreciated his humility and transparent heart for the lost. It was so refreshing. He mentioned at the end how we could be praying for him and his family. I want to do this. He talked about an orphanage (I think in a third-world country) where the children all have special needs. He said these kids likely won't make it past another year. He added that he got down on his hands and knees with them and prayed and sang ... It was all he could do. I started crying. I think the Lord has given me a heart for people who are suffering and don't know Jesus ... I look forward to seeing what He will do with the things He has placed on my heart. It could simply be things like what He did last night.
 
When we were in line for Mr. Freeze, I had the opportunity to talk to a 13-year-old girl, Kimbero. I sensed the Lord may be putting it on my heart to share my testimony with her, so I did. And I got to pray with her (for her headache), and she asked me if I'd like to ride with her. Of course I said sure. :o) I was hoping to get to. It was cute; from the moment we got "buckled in" on the ride and were getting ready to "take off", she clasped my hand and didn't let go until we were about to get off. Right before the ride started she said, "I hope I don't throw up." I told her we would pray and that Jesus could help her not to. :o) And He did! Some of us also got to give her a couple of tracts, and I also gave tracts to two teenage girls I got to talk to. That made my day.

The service we render to others is really the rent we pay for our room on this earth. It is obvious that man is himself a traveler; that the purpose of this world is not 'to have and to hold' but 'to give and serve.' There can be no other meaning.
--Sir Wilfred T. Grenfell
 
What a great quote. I thought I'd share it here tonight. Found it yesterday when I was at Barnes and Noble's bookstore--one of my favorite places that holds fond college memories. :o) The quote was in a book I was perusing, in between writing stories for the web.
 
Not much else is going on. Work is going well. Today I ate lunch with a coworker at Atlanta Bread Company. We had some fun laughs together, and good talks. She is a precious sister who has faithfully served part-time at GFA for close to 14 years now.
 

I'm back. My home computer is being looked at, as it shut itself down a few times while I was working on a writing assignment. So I'm using my roommate's for a few minutes. :o)

Not a whole lot is going on. I've just missed writing in here. :o) This has been a good week so far. Yesterday I had some good time with the Lord during my lunch break. And He has given me much-needed peace about a decision I was struggling with. What a blessing! He is so good to us.

Church was good today. Our pastor spoke on the Apostle Paul, and how his life was poured out as an offering to the Lord. I sat on a bench outside church and journaled about it. I am amazed at the Apostle Paul's self-sacrificial, consecrated life. Sometimes I wonder, will I get to that point? The Lord has brought me a long way, yet I know there still are so many areas in which I need to die to myself. I am so glad He who has begun a good work in me will complete it! (Philippians 1:6) He is faithful, even when I am not.

This afternoon I got a bunch done as far as writing. Tonight at our staff worship service I had Kids Korner. I shared a very brief lesson about Joseph, and how he forgave his brothers even when they had been mean to him--and how Jesus died for forgiveness of sin. I had the sweetest brother and sister in there whose parents are visiting friends. The little girl was excited when she saw me again during the fellowship time afterwards. :o)

Tonight we played volleyball. I did quite poorly. But it was so much fun! :o) People seem to enjoy it so much; maybe we'll do it more. Tomorrow I'm meeting up with some coworkers to go eat at McAlisters Deli, a really yummy restaurant that we have back home, and didn't have here--until it very recently came here. I can't wait! :o)

Today was a good day overall. I had fun with Ruthie and Dorinda! But my night was rather unfocused. And I'm tired. And, I'm struggling with a decision I need to make.

I so much want to do what God wants, whatever that may be, but right now I'm not 100% sure what that is.

Praise God that His mercies are new every morning! (Lamentations 3:22,23) And that His Word tells us if we ask Him for the wisdom we lack, He will give it to us. (James 1:5)

Tonight our brother Zac Poonen shared with us again, one last time. It was probably my favorite session. How it impacted me would be hard to express in words, so I won't try at the moment, especially as I am tired. Maybe I'll write more tomorrow.

I so much want to be obedient to everything the Lord would have me do, even when it's not easy. Brother Zac really brought out how, when Jesus walked this earth, He did nothing on His own volition--He only did the will of the Father. If Jesus, being perfect, did this, how much more should we? Please, please pray for me with this. Even as I write these things I know weak I am in my fallen human flesh, yet I so much desire to be like silly putty in His hands. To do His bidding and live for Him alone.

After Brother Zac shared, some of us gals on staff went to a family's house to hang out and have root beer floats. When we got home, my roommate Dorinda read me a bedtime story. :o) It was about a monster waiting at the end of the book. Except that the monster turns out to be the main character; he just doesn't know it yet. It was fun! She bought the book for a young mother on staff when she was having her first child. Now she's going to give the sequel (about two monsters who turn out to be the two main characters) to a younger sibling in the same family. I think that is a great gift for her.

Today has been such a good day. We have Brother Zac Poonen here sharing with us. It's always a treat when he comes; I have some of his tapes from when I was raising support, and I got so much out of them. In one of the tapes, he spoke of how of utmost importance is God's name being hallowed. Earthly circumstances don't matter; it's all about Him. When He is given the reverence due His name--the adoration He so much deserves--everything else falls into place. (Matthew 6:33)

This morning and evening he spoke to our staff. In speaking about the judgement we as Christians will go through, he made a statement that gripped me: "We need to live as people who know that one day we will give an account to God of everything we did and why." Wow. Quite convicting! I don't know how much I had really stopped to think of the full implications of 2 Corinthians 5:9-10.

Over lunch, I had the opportunity to talk with coworkers about the message we heard this morning. I may try to write more about each session later; right now I'm heading to catch some Zzzzzz's. Good night!

Tonight after prayer meeting, a group of us went to Starbucks and hung out. It was fun! I had some good laughs. I also got to ride in a convertible with some friends. I enjoyed waving my arms around in the breeze. :o) Although it was about 91 degrees, it still felt pretty nice outside!

I'm back! And ready to start this new week. :o) We all ended up getting a little sunburned, even though most of us (probably all of us?) wore sunscreen. And it was rather hot and humid outside. But, oh, how nice it was going to sleep to the sound of crickets chirping--and waking up to the birds singing. And being able to walk around at night and actually see the stars.

I enjoyed the ride back today with my friend Jen, and then had so much fun hanging out with my roommates afterwards. One of my roommates was out of town for a bit. It was so much fun chatting and catching up today. Well, I should go and work on something that needs to be completed by tomorrow. :o) It shouldn't take long. Good night!

A group of us are going camping today! I can't wait. Last night was extended prayer ('til 12 A.M.) at the ministry, yet I woke up this morning just a little after 8, refreshed and ready to go. :o) I was reading Psalm 138:8 this morning. Great verse. Well, have a blessed weekend, and Happy 4th of July. :o)

I got to bed early last night. Okay, so, early for me, not early for some people. :o) 10:15. Today I felt so much more rested than I did yesterday. I'm learning (albeit slowly) that my night owl habits of college won't work here. I would be up so late some nights working, studying with buddies, hanging out with groups of friends, etc. And I enjoyed it. For one semester, I even had two days a week where I didn't have class until about 6 P.M. So ... you guessed it ... I could sleep in as long as I wanted. :o) But that's not the case here. Yet this is a small sacrifice I can make for the Kingdom. What a privilege to be linked with a harvest of precious souls in Asia.

Tonight at staff prayer, I was reminded of the sense of urgency--the potential for literally millions to be reached with the Gospel, yet the short amount of time we have. Each day 80,000 people in Asia slip into eternity without having heard the Gospel even one time. Dear friend, would you please pray that the Lord would help me live very purposefully and be diligent in doing as much as I can to further His kingdom in Asia, with the life that He has given me? I so much desire an eternal perspective, to see things as HE sees them. This life is indeed so short ... only what's done for our Savior will last.

Lindi, Whit, Angela and I went to a Chinese restaurant after church today. It was a unique shopping center, with several ethnic food places and shops. Lindi took us to a cafe owned by a Taiwanese family, and she bought an avocado shake for us to try. To be honest, I didn't think I'd like it (but was willing to try it for a fun adventure), but it was great! :o) They put several straws in the cup, and we were all sharing it as we walked back to the car. That was my favorite part of our time together ... reminded me of some memorable times from junior high and high school, hanging out with Ann Marie, Becka and Angela. :o) We were too funny ... I have to laugh when I read some of my journal entries from those days!

I am a bit tired tonight, but all things considered, doing quite well. This is such an exciting time for me. It seems that the Lord is working on, and enabling me to be victorious in, several different areas of my life. I'm so thankful for that. It is truly He who deserves all the glory. There is nothing good in me. Even the desire to know Him more is a desire He had to put in me. Here's an excerpt from a journal entry I wrote Friday.

Lord, I am so thankful to You for bringing me here (to GFA). I was just thinking of how you have taught me so much (for example, about being faithful in the little things, claiming contentment in every situation, serving behind the scenes, living more purposefully, etc.) since I've been here. Wow. Thank You, Lord. Who am I, that I should deserve this? Truly, I am amazed and thankful.

Our Savior is so loving and kind! I feel like I am overflowing with joy and thankfulness. This morning I was thinking about how the Lord is using things in my life to refine me. And I rejoiced in that. Somehow, all else fades away and becomes a shadow when compared with the light of His presence. Abiding in Him, what have I to worry about? Nothing. There is such joy in being with Him. I love Him so much.

That's not all. I was looking through field reports and thinking what an awesome privilege it is ... to not only intercede for these needs, but also that I get to be His voice to drive others to prayer. Wow. He is so good to me. Who am I that I should deserve this? Just then, my team leader walked by and mentioned that someone sponsored 12 missionaries after this week's email update was forwarded to them. I can't begin to tell you how that encouraged me and ministered to my heart. Indeed, it is worth it all. Why do we ever complain? Our God is SO good to us. :o)

Lately I find the Lord continually allowing me to face situations that drive me to my knees. Situations that aren't easy, but that I can rejoice in, for, just like the oyster out of which a beautiful, exquisite pearl emerges after sandy irritations, He is bringing out of these things a greater good. He is molding me, His undeserving child, to be more like Christ. Hallelujah! By faith I rejoice in these things and claim, like the Apostle Paul, that "none of these things move me." Praise God!

My roommates and I just got done praying together--something we do pretty much every night, that has been such a blessing. I am tired right now ... but still hoping to pray a little before going to bed.

Our message at prayer meeting tonight was one of those that you don't ever want to forget, that you want to live out each moment--for the rest of your life. Reminding us of our call to die to ourselves for the sake of reaching a lost world, our brother asked some hard questions.

Am I willing to die to my right to an apology if falsely accused (or wronged in any other way)? To my right to "fairness"? (How eternally grateful I am that God has acted mercifully toward me instead of doing what is fair--what I rightfully deserve as a sinner.)

Am I willing to die to my right to be understood? To any glory or attention? To any dismay over others getting the glory instead? To trying to control my life?

Have we risen above our own pettiness? Are we actively crying out to God for nearly 3 billion people who have never heard the Good News? What are the daisy chains in my life--those things that are keeping me from giving everything I've got to reach the lost world? What are the things I'm holding on to? The things I don't want to give up? May I die to them!

Toward the end we were challenged to ask Jesus to show us specific ways in which we can die to ourselves--what things He would have us lay at His feet. I know this isn't easy. Please pray the Father would reveal His heart to me--and then grant me the discipline to implement what He shows me. I know even this desire comes from Him, for in my flesh dwells no good thing.

This was such a nice night. Several of us went and ate with a family on staff--and played chinese checkers and watched The Princess Bride together. I so much enjoyed it! And tomorrow is church. I'm so much looking forward to that. :o)

I had such a nice time with Ruthie and Suzi tonight. We headed over to Ruthie's church to hear a special speaker, then we three hung out at Sonic and chatted for a bit. What a perfect end to a rather long week ... a refreshing breeze!

I want to reread Elisabeth Elliot's A Path Through Suffering. Just her life in itself speaks volumes to me--that she would go back and minister to the very people who were responsible for her young husband's death. But I read this particular book while I was in college, and was so encouraged by it. This week I have been poignantly reminded of how, for whatever reason, the Lord has been allowing some hard situations in my life. Our staff ladies' meeting last night was about this, and how He uses these things to prune us and prepare us for things He would have us do in the future.

Though this past week hasn't been the easiest, somehow I've been feeling so much better today. We had a really good devotion this morning during staff prayer. The young man leading it told the story of a man who would go places and speak.

Every place he'd go, two men would show up with signs, protesting and saying he wasn't speaking the truth. I'm sure the man must have become pretty exasperated. But one day he had a vision of a beautiful piece of metal. He said, "Lord, how did you make that?"

Then the Lord showed him how putting it through the fire would make an even more exquisite piece of metal. That man then saw the two troublemakers as God's chosen instruments of refining and shaping in his life. The next time he saw the men he was practically running up to them and hugging them and saying, "Can I help you carry your signs?" He was so thankful for this means of becoming more like Jesus. O, that we would all learn to see life in this way!

Last Saturday as we walked away from a ride at Six Flags, I got a vivid glimpse of the field in Asia. Even as I thought of how fun our ride had been, the image came to me of the little children I saw begging on the crowded streets of India, and the contrast it was. I don't think I'll ever forget their sweet, high-pitched/shrill voices saying, "Rupees please, sir."

Even though they are on the other side of the world, they felt so real to me at that moment. Driving home from dropping off a friend who lives in my complex, I prayed these precious people will have a chance to hear the Gospel.

In church Sunday morning, they showed slides from our recent VBS. As children's faces flashed across the screen, I couldn't help thinking again of the dirty, bedraggled children in India ... children who are so cherished in the sight of God ... and no less beautiful to Him than my adorable nephews. O that these children would get to hear about Jesus!

When I was in India at one of the Dalit schools, the children sang songs and brought colorful flowers to each of us. As I looked around and saw the faces of these children--little ones now hearing about the hope found in Christ Jesus--I started crying. I felt a stirring within me ... and wondered what it meant. It may mean nothing more than that the Lord would have me on my knees more and more as a prayer warrior on their behalf. I would be content with that. Whatever the case, I want to be pliable in His hands, letting Him prepare me for each thing He would have me do for the furtherance of His kingdom.

Today three friends and I went to Six Flags. We had SO much fun! When we first got there, we got to ride Batman and MR. Freeze twice in a row. That's unusual. Generally those lines are really long! It sure is nice having a season pass. They were such a good deal, too!

I'm so glad we all got to hang out today and ride so many fun rides together. We had some good laughs but also meaningful conversations as well. There were situations where I felt I could have had quite a bit more grace toward others (and been more willing to die to self in the "little" things). I kind of apologized for that.

At the same time, though, everyone had such a nice time and expressed how appreciative they were that I'd gotten this outing together. They very much sounded like they'd like to do this again. Praise God! It's good to know His mercies are new every morning--that He is continually working in this clay vessel, to conform me ever more into the image of His dear Son. I have so far to go, but He isn't about to give up on me!

Last night I asked my roommate to pray everyone would have a nice time, that we would have meaningful conversation (and be a light for Christ to those around us!), and that we may get to talk with others standing in line, if that be the Lord's will. The Lord answered ALL those requests--I even got to talk a little to a lady in line with her husband for Mr. Freeze. We ran into each other again while we were in line for the Titan. She teased that she was following us. It was fun to see her--It kind of felt like I'd made a friend. :o) I did get to share with her that we work for a ministry that spreads the Gospel in Asia. Who knows what seeds may have been planted! Perhaps she will start thinking and will want to know Jesus, if she doesn't yet.

Tonight we had a roommate dinner. We enjoyed eating and fellowshipping together. I made beef taco skillet for this special time. :o) My roommates seemed to really enjoy it, and that made me so happy.

On my way to go get the ingredients at Wal-mart during my lunch hour, I went by the office of a co-worker and friend, Kara. She heard I was going to Wal-mart and asked if I could get something for her-- shirts for her mom.

"You don't know what a blessing this is," Kara told me. "I never seem to get to Wal-mart lately." (She has much on her plate, yet so often has such an upbeat outlook) I told her it was no problem.

It was fun picking out cute shirts for her mom. (She told me her mom likes pastels and flowery patterns ... just like me. :o)) I love when the Lord paves the way and uses me to encourage someone. That just makes my day! :o)

Tomorrow I'm eating lunch with another co-worker and friend, Cindy. And I can't wait! :o)

My friend Terri and I had such a nice time together eating at Chili's tonight, to celebrate her graduation. I was telling her how last November my roommates and I ate at Chili's to celebrate my first year of being here. It is truly a comforting and thrilling thing to be right where God would have me be, as far as the big picture.

I also want to be faithful in the little things. The everyday decisions in life. For this past week I've been eating healthy and not drinking any soft drinks. I know it's the grace of God. I am so thankful for how He is working in my life, and He deserves all the glory.

I am actually writing this at 12:46 A.M. Saturday morning, but I find it easier for postings' sake to post this as a Friday entry, right before midnight. It still feels like Friday to me. :o) I've do this for the other "late night" entries as well ... that way I don't usually have two posts in one day.

We had extended prayer tonight. I am sooooo tired. My left shoulderblade was hurting--it does that from time to time--but one of my friends gave me a shoulder rub, and it's feeling so much better already. I am reminded that we are in a very real battle as we seek to reach the Indian subcontinent with the Gospel. Tonight we heard much about how God is working and how doors have been opened to even reach so many more with the Good News. Praise God. It is worth it all.

Tomorrow I don't have much of anything planned. My prayer is that I would walk in the Spirit, and not in the flesh--that I would know what the Lord wants me to do and do it. I have been pretty busy and kind of tired, so I hope to get to relax for a while. :o)

The other night at prayer meeting, Brother K.P.'s sharing really gripped me. I so much want to live a simple life (as far as this world) and be purposeful in how I spend my time. He asked some powerful questions.

Who is willing to abandon their comfort, their sleep, their rights--for the sake of Jesus?

Am I willing to walk away from a lukewarm Christian life and deliberately choose the way of suffering for His sake?

Am I willing to pay the price? Giving everything we've got for the sake of His kingdom is worth it.

I am reminded of our dear leader in North India, and the words he spoke to our 16-member group as we sat in his home, also the GFA area office. He read from
Hebrews 12:1,2 and told us that whatever we give up for the sake of Jesus and reaching the lost, it is worth it all. He thanked us. Of course it boggled my mind, because we think of them as giving up so much.

Today was Memorial Day. I worked in the office for a few hours today, so in a lot of ways it didn't feel like a holiday. Yet progress was made on some content I'm adding to our website, and I realize this will play a part in people in Asia being reached with the Gospel.

I think the hardest things about today were that for some reason I felt stressed out, and I had a headache part of the day, some soreness in my shoulders, and an itchy throat. Lately I've found myself being continually brought to the place where I realize all over again, it's not about me and my comfort or ease. There is a greater good that the Lord is working in my life, even if it must come through hardship. This is a good thing to be reminded of, even though it's not always easy. I think a great deal of our discontentment in life comes from our own selfish desire for an "ideal" life. :o) And when it comes right down to it, serving the Lord to reach the lost is ultimately the best, most exciting thing we could ever do--even if it means trials and struggles in this life.

Tonight I had a nice supper with our web team leader and his family. His wife asked me what I've been learning spiritually. I told her one really big thing I've been learning is how the Lord is always good and faithful to me--no matter what my circumstances. Now matter what has happened to me (or hasn't happened that I wished would), He is forever loving and kind in all of His dealings with me. How comforting that is! It's something I don't want to forget--even for a moment.

I had a fun-filled day of riding rollercoasters at Six Flags with a big group of us young people from the office. We left at about 9:15 this morning and didn't get back until close to midnight. We rode so many rides. On the way back, we ran into a church group at Steak 'n Shake. It was nice getting to chat with them and share a little about GFA. One of the young men couldn't believe a native missionary could live on less than $1500 a year. I think he was pretty excited about that. :o) Praise God. I enjoy opportunities to share the ministry.

The college group left today. One of the gals (close to my age) mentioned they'd had such a good stay here. She said something like, "We were coming thinking we would help out. We didn't expect ya'll to go all out for us." What servant's hearts these young people have! I'm so glad they came. I hope they can come back.

Tonight we went to the house of a young couple on staff, for a get-to-gether with some Oklahoma college students who have been giving their time to help out at the office these last few days. I have so much enjoyed getting to know this dear group of students! After eating our taco supper (and some of my roommate Dorinda's much-loved cookies for dessert :o)) some of us walked around the block with them. That was neat.

Last night we all went to Braum's and talked over scoops of ice cream. I was asking Josh what all he did at the office yesterday. He said he helped put some shelves together. Then I put two and two together and realized which shelves he'd assembled. I said, "Oh, in the finance department!" He said "Yeah!" I was telling him what a blessing that was and how one of my coworkers in that area had even mentioned the shelves and shown them to me.

Now boxes of important ministry documents and records that were temporarily scattered or stacked on the floor are on shelves where they can stay organized and easily accessed.

What a labor of love on the part of these college students. And to think it's helping to plant churches in Asian villages where people once had never heard the name of Jesus. Praise God! It was especially encouraging to see Josh's reaction--how he was so encouraged to know that they'd been able to serve behind the scenes and make an impact.

Deep down, isn't that what we all long for? A life of eternal significance, spent and poured out for the furtherance of the Gospel and His kingdom? I know I do.

Yay! The Lord gave me the strength to get going this morning and meet my friend for prayer. I am so much not a morning person and have found I do best having my times with the Lord either during lunch break or right after work, but today I got to thinking about the idea of starting off each day--first thing--with fellowship in His presence. What a way to start the day.

It reminds me of a story a brother shared tonight during prayer meeting, about a field leader who is so devoted to prayer and continually depends on Jesus, realizing he is nothing without him. His story is a powerful one: I may share more another night when I'm not tired. But I did want to leave you with something our brother on staff told us about how his life has changed through the leader's stay in his home: "It's not 'I need to pray more' or 'I should pray more.' Now it's 'I have to pray more.'"

Oh that we all would have, each moment, that determined desperation--that deep longing and hunger to meet with the One who created us and loves us more than we can imagine.

Today after work I spent a little time with the Lord and then went walking -- 2.5 miles. Exercise feels so good! :o) Then I navigated my way through two grocery stores, buying stuff like carrots, tomatoes, salad lettuce, oranges, yogurt, breakfast bars, etc. I figured the breakfast bars will come in handy for mornings. (I am so not a morning person!)

Believe it or not, I'm planning to make it to the office by 7:45 tomorrow. That's BRIGHT and early! And I'm actually looking forward to getting there that early. :o) Come again? Yep, I'm looking forward to it because I get to start the day off in prayer with my friend Sarah--and anyone else the Lord brings our way. I hope I can wake up and get going in time. :o)

I had a wonderful time and such sweet fellowship today with one of my coworkers, Sarah. We went to Six Flags to process our seasonal passes. While we were there, we rode two rides--the Giant and the Titan. Strangely enough, the Titan wasn't at all as scary as I remembered it to be from last year. I think it was scarier then because it was the first roller coaster I'd ever been on.

Anyhow, they took pictures of us during the rides, and it was hilarious--Even though we were having fun and laughing hard, in every picture we looked like we were stressed out and about to cry. That of course just made us laugh even more. :o)

After we rode the two rides, we went and picked up a couple of gals from the office, and we went to a couple of Indian clothing stores. The prices were GREAT, and I bought two sarees. I can't wait to wear them. :o)One of our friends also got a saree. I was excited for her. Then several of us went and ate Mexican food and fellowshipped. Sarah and I were soooooo hungry ... we'd hardly had anything to eat all day. :o) That food hit the spot. It was SO funny--We were in the middle of this conversation when all of a sudden I feel this water dripping on me. I honestly thought someone was being funny and throwing water on me, but then we looked up and there was this big drip in the ceiling, right above me. We started laughing.

Sarah would really like to start getting some of us gals together to pray. I would really like that. The cry of my heart is to have deeper relationships with others. I think there are more of us who desire that than we would think, it's just that we are all so busy. Fellowship is so important, and we need to be proactive in seeking it out.

I know today was a blessed day and so refreshing. Friendships are so special!

Another week has come and gone. Boy, does time pass fast here! Probably because we stay pretty busy.

I ate lunch with my coworker Cindy. I really appreciate her!

Tonight was Terri's graduation. She had the privilege of praying during the ceremony, and her love for Jesus was beautifully evident as she prayed. Terri, 18, and her sister, Heather, help me out with web stories. I have very much enjoyed getting to know them and watching them blossom as young women.

Yesterday I went and got Six Flags passes for a group of us. They were a great price, and we plan to get much use out of them. :o) Heather, 15, handed me this note at the reception tonight, along with the money for hers:

Rachel, thanks for organizing all this! I look forward to screaming with you. See you on the Titan!!

That was fun. :o) I can't wait for the three of us to hang out at Six Flags one of these days soon. Oh, and BTW--for those of you who've never been to Six Flags over Texas-- The Titan is this incredibly scary (to me, at least)--thus quite thrilling--rollercoaster with a very steep downhill curve.

Well, I'm off to get a few more things done before I go to bed. Tomorrow we're having some gals over to the apartment for prayer, worship, food and fellowship. :o) Should be fun. Our prayer is that Jesus be lifted up and each person encouraged.

How nice it is to write in here ... I missed yesterday, and tonight it feels like I'm coming back to an old friend.

Speaking of old friends, after a considerable amount of "phone tagging", I got back in touch last night with the family I mentioned on Saturday. We had a really good talk.

He (my Bible study leader from back home) asked what brought me here. I explained how God had called me to serve with Gospel for Asia and asked if he'd heard of it before. He said that he did hear about it for the first time, through a recent event closeby. I was so excited, because I helped stuff boxes with materials for that day: In fact, we'd had a big assembly line of sorts, set up in our meeting room. He was saying that maybe they even got one of the boxes I packed. :o)

Anyhow, they're in the process of moving to another house, and after that they plan to have me over to catch up and eat barbeque. I sure do look forward to that. :o)

What a day. I don't know if words can suffice to relate everything that took place, but I will sure try.

This morning I did some laundry and then went by the office to say farewell to the brothers and sisters from the field. They were eating little Subway sandwiches in our staff kitchen. :o) Then they needed to catch their flight for the first leg of the long trip back.

I caught the 12:00 service at my church. My friend Lindy and I had a really good time of sharing what is on our hearts and praying for each other.

One thing on her heart is that she wants to know where the Lord would have her work. She has several interviews lined up and is very excited about one of them, in Ohio. I sure would miss her, but I would understand if that's what God is calling her to. :o) Do pray for this dear young woman, that she would clearly hear God's voice for her vocation. Of course, I would love to see her come serve here at Gospel for Asia with me. :o) Something on my heart was that I was again missing my college church this afternoon. When the service ended I cried a little.

I felt the Lord really put it on my heart to go see the movie The Passion today. I thought of how it would help put things back into perspective--how the laying down of His life for me is far greater than the small sacrifice I am making to serve Him here--or any other sacrifice I could ever make. There's no comparison.

So,I drove around a bit looking for a theater where it was playing. You've gotta remember, I have neither a newspaper or a cell phone. :o) I went to two local theaters before finding out about one with a 5:40 showing. I excitedly thanked the lady who gave me this info, ran to the car (it was 5:12) and found the theater just in time.

One thing the Lord really used to speak to my heart during the movie was how several of the people embraced the suffering of the man who played Jesus. I was especially impacted when the man carrying his Cross had his arm around the bleeding actor: He did not shrink back from his suffering but instead showed his love by coming alongside him. I don't think I will soon forget that.

This was a nice day. When my sister and I were sitting at the park watching the boys play, we smelled something cooking on a grill. Boy, did it smell good. I told her how I miss that from my Bible study days back home--when we would hang out and eat at the park. I decided I wanted to call the family of a Bible study leader whom I found out lives in this area. I'd been busy and putting it off, but I would love to meet up with them and fellowship again! It sure would be nice to see a familiar face or two from back home. :o)

Tonight as I was driving home, the sunset in the sky was so pretty. I had a nice time at the outlet mall on the way back, and got some good deals. I gave a tract to the cash register lady at Taco Bell. I hope she reads it.

Tonight I attended a rodeo with some others on staff. It was beautiful outside, with a refreshing cool air. I enjoyed chatting with people on the drive back--even though we were so tired. It's been a full, very busy week. But that's not a bad thing. :o)

Tomorrow morning I'm heading out to meet my sister and nephews for lunch at McAllisters and a trip to the zoo. I sure am looking forward to that. :o)

I had a nice day today. Pretty much finished my newsletter, just need to see about a few things.

This morning we found out about a married couple who will be coming on staff. For the past month they've been here with us, working behind the scenes on various jobs that nobody else has time to do. I truly appreciate their servant's hearts. How exciting that they will be joining our staff!

A friend is back to visit us; it was fun getting to see him. And tonight in our ladies' meeting, the wives of two field leaders shared their stories. Incredible testimonies! I wrote down this quote from one: "The Lord has satisfied us in all our needs." This was said with such a joyful heart, coming from the lips of a woman who nearly died from complications during a birth, almost lost their first child and, with her husband, forsook a very comfortable lifestyle for the sake of carrying out Christ's call to bring the Good News to some of the most unreached.

Wow. All glory to God. It matters not what circumstances we may find ourselves in--or whether we have much or little in this life. In Him is everything we need.

P.S. I need to get back to writing a press release that will go out tomorrow. I so much desire that God give me His words. I know my words are of no significance, yet His are full of life.

A pastor shared with us. So much of what he said went along with what the Lord has been teaching me about serving behind the scenes. It was so encouraging--while also quite challenging.

This afternoon I got a couple of web stories written and did a few other things. It was a good day!

Then tonight was our fun (talent) show at the office. Afterwards I played tag in part of our parking lot with some kids (so much fun!).

A group of us went to Braum's with some gals from our Canadian office. That was fun! I had a scoop of strawberry cheesecake icecream in a waffle cone. Yummy!

Tomorrow the pastor who shared today will share with us again. I'm really looking forward to it!

My parents were encouraged by today. I am so glad! It was tiring at times, but a good day. I feel renewed.

A neat thing happened this afternoon. Between sessions of the building dedication, we were sitting at a table in our kitchen area. It was just my parents and I for a bit. I got to thinking it would be so nice if someone who came "on their own" could sit with us. (See, there are just four chairs to a table)

Well, the Lord brought in our pathway a ministry supporter whose wife couldn't make it to the dedication. I started talking to him and then my parents joined in. We had such good fellowship with him. He loves the ministry and has such a heart for the lost. He drives a 1965 car and is happy to do all he can to reach people who need the hope of the Gospel.

Someone ordered pizza and we were all going through the line. My mom and I saw there wasn't much left, and we weren't very hungry anyhow, so we didn't take any. Then my dad and our new friend went up. My dad grabbed a piece of pizza and then he did, too. We were so glad he got a piece.

But guess what he did when he got back to the table? He immediately plunked that piece of pizza on my plate! He was so sweet about it, and insisted I have it. I was truly touched by his kind and sacrificial heart. Needless to say, even though I wasn't particularly hungry, I ate that piece of pizza. :o)

Praise God for people like him.

Hmmm ... the battle continued? It sure felt like it.

Somehow everytime I turned around (well, just about)I was crying. Tomorrow is our building dedication, celebrated with precious brothers and sisters from the field, as well as other staff and supporters from all over the world. I think the Lord will be greatly praised tomorrow as we give Him glory for what He and He alone has done, and the enemy isn't too happy with that.

One of our leaders saw me this morning and prayed for me, and my friend Jen came up and joined us. That meant so much. And one of my roommates prayed for me in the afternoon. I appreciated that.

Thankfully my day ended well. My parents are in town, and I visited them at their hotel, where we chatted, laughed, looked at my India pictures and ate some yummy food at Souper!Salad!. It was just what I needed. The Lord used our time together to really encourage me. Praise God.

Now I need to get some sleep ... Tomorrow is a long day. :)

I've been feeling kind of sad tonight -- I think a combination of a lot of different things. This afternoon I was on my college church website for a little bit. The people there have such a special place in my heart. There are times (like today) when I miss them so much. Even though I just saw them in February, it feels like it's been a while.

It still feels like the Lord is really stretching me ... and lately the battle as I serve here has been intense. But it's great to know that nothing that happens in my life is by accident. It's all part of His plan to conform me more and more into the image of Christ. He is so loving and kind, even when I am weary and don't always understand what's going on. This afternoon I took a four-hour nap. I must have been pretty exhausted. ;o)

We had some roommate bonding today--One of my roommates and I scrubbed the countertop and tub of the bathroom we share, went to Wal-mart to pick up some things we needed for the apartment (and tomorrow's potluck at the office!) and grabbed supper at Chick-fila. There was a nice breeze outside, and we ate at the small playground outside our apartment.

Tomorrow is a special Sunday morning worship service at the ministry. Staff from other offices, as well as the brothers and sisters from the field, will join in. It looks like I'll be in Tot Spot, keeping the kiddos. At first I was sad that I would likely miss out on the service. Yet when I saw the first brother from the field step out of that van Friday, somehow my perspective changed. I even got excited about the opportunity to serve behind the scenes and die to myself in the situation.

We all gathered in our courtyard to greet the brothers and sisters from the field. We watched them pull up in a van. As soon as the first person stepped out, I started crying.

It was an incredible moment, one that I never want to forget. We all clapped as they came out and gathered around. I felt like I was transported back to India, where they all would clap to welcome us and the girls at one of the Bible colleges washed our feet --another moment I'll never forget.

Every time I see these beloved brethen from the field, I get a glimpse of the person I want to be. I thank God for the many ways in which He has been deliberately arranging circumstances in my life to hold me the commitment I made Sunday night--to more and more share in His sufferings and be radically abandoned to reaching the lost world He died for. I so much don't want to grieve His heart. (Ephesians 4:30)

Lately I've been feeling like the oyster shell that gets many scratches and irritations--before producing a beautiful pearl, quite different from the dullness it once had. Praise God. And I am reminded of how the His kingdom is like that pearl of great price, for which the merchant sold everything he had. When we are focused on our beautiful Savior and His incredible love for us, everything else fades in comparison. Thank You, Lord.

Here are some words I wrote in my journal a few minutes before the brothers and sisters from the field got here:

I can hardly believe it ... in just a few moments the brothers and two of their wives will be here. A little over a month ago we saw them ... on the other side of the world. :o) And now here they are ... Wow.

Thank You so much, Lord. May you get all the glory.

Oh, Lord, I am nothing without you. Anything I have or am is because of You and You alone. Help me to have a servant's heart toward my brothers and sisters here. And, oh Lord, give us each humble hearts that would not seek recognition but would seek to be a blessing to our brothers and sisters from the field. Thank You, Lord.

I think the Lord is teaching me some key lessons. I so much want to be humble and not seeking attention but just seeking to serve. It seems He's deliberately bringing circumstances into my life to drive me to this. It's hard at times, yet SO rewarding. Praise the Lord, as one of our brothers from the field in Asia would say, with the biggest grin on his face.

He is one of the brothers who arrived today. Right before they all pulled up to the office, I took my lunch break and had such a sweet time with the Lord. I was sitting outside in our back patio area, enjoying the wonderful breeze--but especially His presence in the midst of it. It's the greatest thing--there is nothing like it!

Guess what? I finished the photo caption project today. Praise the Lord! I was excited.

My roommate Dorinda and I had lunch at Arby's to celebrate this special moment. :o)

Now I need to work on some more web projects, but I don't think they'll be quite as extensive as that one. Amazing that the Lord could use someone like me for the furtherance of His Gospel. Thank you, Lord.

Tomorrow a group of leaders from the field get here. I had the privilege to meet several while I was in India and am looking forward to seeing them again. Thinking of these precious brothers and their families reminds me of the great cloud of witnesses we have. (Hebrews 12:1) Incredible.

I've been working on a photo caption project for our website redesign. Sometimes it feels that I have hardly made any progress--even though I've worked on it a considerable amount. Yet I know by faith it will be finished soon.

The Lord has been stretching me lately ... but it's a good thing, such a good thing. The prayer of my heart at the beginning of this week was that I would more and more embrace the Cross, sharing in His sufferings. He has been faithful to bring about opportunities. Somehow I am so encouraged and I know He will see me through. And I know the little things I encounter in the battle are nothing compared to what Jesus willingly suffered for me.

Tonight after prayer meeting I had a good chat with a friend and gave a little girl a piggyback ride outside. :o) Then another friend and I went to her apartment and prayed for a while. It was an incredible time! Even though physically tired, my heart was renewed. It was like a breath of fresh air.

We also had some great time of fellowship ... some good laughs. :o) I'm so thankful for the family He has provided me with here.

Ladies Dessert Night at Church.

A friend from work went with me. We had such a nice time. Some of the women there were trying to recruit me to go to the ladies retreat this August. :o) I must admit, it does sound like fun. I would love to continue getting to know this group. Even after going to this church a year, there are still quite a few people I haven't met yet.

During the program I was touched by the servant's heart of one of the young husbands as he worked the sound system and brought a "better working" microphone to the main speaker.

Afterwards we were pampered by some of the men waiting on us and bringing us fancy little desserts and punch. They were all such gentlemen. :o)

We were all supposed to find someone to give our extra name tag to, so they could pray for us. I met a really sweet lady who gave me hers, and I gave her mine as well.

Today was one of those gorgeous days outside. :o) Thank you, Lord.

Tonight at our Sunday service the Lord really ministered to me during the worship. For a while I was just sitting there with my eyes closed, resting in His presence.

He is indeed so comforting. What a friend we have in Jesus! I am reminded of Joab from when we were in India-- how he had such bubbling joy when he talked about Jesus being his friend.

How incredible Heaven is going to be ... to be with our brothers and sisters on the other side of the world-- brethren we've had the privilege to link our lives with here on this earth, so the Lord could use them to reach so many with the Good News of Christ. Praise God.

Getting to meet some of these believers while I was in India felt like a little taste of Heaven. Just imagine how wonderful it's going to be. Nothing on this earth can be taken with us ... only things that are of eternal value.

The service tonight was about embracing the Cross. When we think of what Jesus gave up for us--the excruciating pain and heartache He suffered by death on the Cross to pay for our sins--how can we not want to love Him back and be willing to give up even those things that are dearest to us, if He would ask this of us?

Even as I write this I know I am weak in my fallen human flesh. Yet I want to more and more embrace the Cross, for the sake of the precious Savior who died for me. Please pray for me.

This morning a group of us moved a staff family from our apartment complex to a house ... and ate a pancake breakfast! It was fun hanging out and talking to my buddies there.

Then tonight my friend Jen and I ate supper (really good baked potatoes and salad) with a family on staff and played a fun game with them. :o) We definitely enjoyed some good laughs.

I sure look forward to church in the morning.

A group of us gals hung out and ate fajitas at someone's apartment tonight. The food was so good. It was fun chatting with friends and enjoying the evening breeze on the balcony.

I'm doing pretty well overall, yet I find myself rather relieved this week is over. The weekend is busy, but I'm still glad for the opportunity to take at least a little bit of a rest. And I'm looking forward to some more fellowship tomorrow with people on staff.

The week has been kind of stressful ... I think it's part of the spiritual battle we're in as we seek to see Asia reached with the Gospel. Please pray for me. I know I am nothing without Christ, and I need His perspective for each moment.

It's the end of another day this week, and I'm exhausted. We five on the web team have been working hard on changes we're making to our current website, www.gfa.org. I am excited about how the Lord will use these things on behalf of the unreached in Asia. Yet there is still so much to be done before our target date of May 7, when ministry supporters and leaders will be coming.

I am somehow encouraged by yesterday's quote from Li De Xian, the Chinese pastor who was imprisoned and tortured for sharing the Good News:

Christ was the first to suffer. We just follow Him. There are many thorns, but we are just injured a little on our feet. This suffering is very little.

I know the little sacrifices I make are nothing compared with what this pastor is going through for the sake of Christ as I write this ... and especially nothing when compared with the ultimate sacrifice Christ made for us. I also know it's an incredible privilege to labor for the furtherance of His kingdom, and the little trials we go through here on this earth are only "for a little while," in comparison to the glorious eternity with our Savior that awaits us. (1 Peter 1:6, Romans 8:18)

All praise be to God.

"Christ was the first to suffer," Pastor Li De Xian said. "We just follow Him. There are many thorns, but we are just injured a little on our feet. This suffering is very little."

Li De Xian, a Chinese pastor, has been arrested for preaching the Gospel more times than he can count. He has endured torture for his faith. Yet, like the apostle Paul, he counts it a privilege to suffer for the sake of Christ. He and his wife don't feel sorry for themselves: They're too busy anticipating the doors the Lord will open next to share the Gospel. When in prison, Xian can reach people he otherwise couldn't.

"Don't feel sorry for us," Xian's wife, Zhao Xia, says of their lifestyle "At least we are constantly reminded that we are in a spiritual war. We know for whom we are fighting. We know who the enemy is. And we are fighting. Perhaps we should pray for you Christians outside of China. In your leisure, in your affluence, in your freedom, sometimes you no longer realize that you are in spiritual warfare."

Wow. Click here to read more of their story, in an article published for the International Day of Prayer for the Persecuted Church, November 9.

(quotes above published in Jesus Freaks and republished in "Continuing to Preach Despite Persecution," www.crosswalk.com.)

A little boy standing in front of a candy store.

Those were the words a coworker used at our prayer meeting this morning to describe a situation that has tremendous potential for the furtherance of God's kingdom in Asia.

Words that really made me think. How often do we live our lives like that? Do we truly see the furtherance of the Gospel as incomparably greater than the thing on earth, whatever it may be, that is dearest to us? I've started memorizing Philippians, and I know that the apostle Paul sure did!

Just as a little boy is ecstatic about a candy store, I want to be that way about storing up treasure in Heaven, "where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal" (Matthew 6:20, NKJV).

Truly, that is what life is all about. When we consider the sacrifice Jesus made for us, how can we not want to love Him back and labor for what is so dear to His heart? (2 Corinthians 5:14-15, 2 Peter 3:9)

It was beautiful outside. I walked close to five miles at the park I like to go to. I think everyone and their uncle was there today. :o)

This morning at church I signed up for our ladies dessert fellowship. I look forward to that. Even though my college church is so dear to me, I also like my church here very much and am so thankful for the Lord's provision.

Tonight after our Sunday night service at the ministry I played tag with some staff children. Then a friend of mine who writes some web stories joined in. It was quite fun ... and very good exercise. :o)

Then my roommates and I decided to go get ice cream cones and have our prayer time at a nearby lake. It was fun to watch the ducks and hear the frogs singing. It looked like some people were out there fishing, too.

Looking back on the potluck, one good-sized serving of chicken enchilada casserole, some stirfry vegetables and three helpings of strawberry shortcake later, I'd say it was a success. :o) There were nine "adults", including us three who live here, plus a toddler. We prayed for each other and played the UN game, where you answer various questions about yourself.

One of my questions? If you could have a sixth sense, what would it be? I said that I would enjoy knowing what would take place in the future ... what all the Lord has in store for my life. That having been said, though, I am content to trust Him one day at a time. I know His way is best. :o) Besides, in a way not knowing makes each day more of an adventure. I know it drives me to dependence on Him, which is good.

Today was a good day. In the morning I walked and ran some errands. We played a really fun game at a baby shower this afternoon for someone on staff. We each had to carry on a conversation on the phone (a "make-believe" one), pick up our "baby" (doll) from her nap and hold her, fold laundry and pack a diaper bag--all pretty much at the same time. It was hilarious. I had fun watching everyone. When my turn came, a friend laughed good naturedly and told me it looked for a moment there like I could use three hands. :o)

I had some more good fellowship with the Lord during lunch today. My desire is to keep short accounts with Him--in the sense that not a day goes by without meaningful, uninterrupted time together. Being in His presence is the best thing!

Tonight was so fun. First I went to the house of a good friend and coworker. Her daughter is in town and is really sweet. Two other women from the ministry were there, too, and we all enjoyed chatting and chuckling together, as well as "pigging out" on yummy food--honey wheat pretzels topped with light cream cheese, chips and a cheese sauce, and cheesecake. You can't beat that! :O) When I was getting ready to leave, one of them asked me to give them a hug. Somehow I was totally oblivious and didn't catch that, and kept walking toward the car. They reminded me about the hug. Hearing them that time, I came back, and we all laughed. It was pretty funny.

Then I went to see another family on staff and play a game with a big group they'd invited over. As I was leaving I got to show my India pictures to the wife. She has been as well, and it was so neat getting to talk to her about how I was impacted there.

I came home around 11 p.m. to a thoughtful gift outside my bedroom door. Just because, one of my roommates had surprised me with some purple soft jersey sheets. They fit my bed great and are pretty and very comfy. Thank you, D! :o)

We roommates talked and prayed, and one suggested we have a slumber party sometime, just the three of us. We could each bring sleeping bags into the living room, watch movies and stay up late chatting and eating popcorn. Sounds good to me! Did I mention I like my roommates? :o)

I just ate most of a Cadbury creme egg. Those things are sooooo good. :o) I had such a wonderful time with the Lord today and walked 2 1/2 miles after work. Saturday night my roommates and I are having a potluck for all our coworkers from our apartment complex. I look forward to that. Our desire is that everyone who comes be encouraged and strengthened as they continue to serve the Lord.

This afternoon at the office felt pretty productive. I walked 3 1/2 miles after work. Then I worked on some web stories.

One of the stories particularly touched my heart. It was the testimony of one of our Bible college students, 19-year-old Grace--a young lady preparing to give her life to reach other women and children with the Good News.

At a very young age, Grace lost her father. Brokenhearted, her mother had to earn a living for the family. Even though she was weak, she was determined to provide so her children could be at school. Many days they would go to school with empty stomachs, wearing worn out clothes. The family grew more sorrowful with each passing day. But then the Lord brought hope into their lives.

"One bright day," Grace relates, "a man of God visited our house and shared with us about Jesus Christ. Moved by compassion, he comforted us through God's Word and helped us understand how Jesus loves and cares for those who trust in Him. With tears in our eyes, we opened our hearts to Jesus and received Him as our Lord and personal Savior."

In the days that followed, the precious family watched as the Lord wonderfully provided for their daily needs. Grace grew in her walk with Jesus. Praying and waiting on Him, she heard His call to full-time evangelistic outreach. She enrolled in a GFA Bible college and is eagerly sharing her faith with others.

By the grace of God there are countless other testimonies like this one--stories of precious people who, like Grace and her family, are being brought from spiritual darkness and despair into His marvelous light. Click here if you would like to read just a few of them.

I thank God every day for the privilege of being His vessel on behalf of the millions of unreached people on the Indian subcontinent. It is my desire that the Lord give me the words that are on His heart--words that will touch hearts for eternity and truly portray the lives of the beloved missionaries He is raising up to reach their people.

What an incredible opportunity it is that you and I can be part of furthering Christ's kingdom in Asia.

All things considered, today was a good day. Nothing out of the ordinary happened, except I had a dentist appointment this morning. It went well, and I enjoyed chatting with the hygenist and dentist. They're really nice, and even give us a great discount. :o)

This afternoon I had the opportunity to write some captions on photos from the field, as well as helping out with a few other tasks. I was telling my team leader in an email that it's such a privilege. So true.

Ultimately, I can't think of anywhere else I'd rather be. That's not to say I don't miss my college and home towns, where some beloved supporters, family and friends are. But even after nearly a year and a half of being here--which, by the way, has passed incredibly fast--I don't go a day without thinking about what an awesome privilege it is getting to serve here ...

... getting to be a part of reaching Asian communities with the Good News of Jesus Christ

... getting to colabor with and encourage such a wonderful family of brothers and sisters in Christ.

I'm so happy to be here.

I'm back. We all went to the park this afternoon. My sister and I biked for close to an hour on a trail. We got quite the workout, especially since we took turns riding with my two nephews behind us. :o)

Then we watched the boys play. The weather was pleasant, with a nice breeze. A friendly 6-year-old girl came up and talked to me and even gave me her hat from her little brother's birthday party. I tried to let her keep it instead, but she insisted. :o)

When I got back to the apartment I unloaded my stuff and then my roommate Dorinda and I had fun walking and chatting about our weekends. Then we returned and all three of us talked during prayer time about how much God loves us and longs to spend time with us, despite our wretched hearts and all our shortcomings. Incredible. Makes me want to spend more time with Him. I want to fall more in love with Him each day.

Hi from my sister's house! When I got here we all went and ate lunch. Then my sister and I went to Target and one other store. Later this afternoon we walked around the lake at a nearby park. Guess what we had for supper? Tacos! That's my favorite all-time food. :o) We made them together. And ... we (well, probably mostly my sister) made carrot cake. I think I'm gonna go eat some now.

Yawn. It's Friday and I'm a little tired. Not too bad, though. This week passed incredibly fast. It was a really good week at the office--I felt like I was able to focus and be productive each day.

Tomorrow I hope to get up bright and early to head for my sister's. I'm looking forward to this weekend. My roommate also wants to wake up early in the morning, so whoever gets up first will knock on the other's door. Aren't roommates handy creatures to have around? :o)

This week has passed so fast! I've been enjoying working on various web tasks each day. I shared tonight about how impacted I was with the contentment and servant's heart of the people on the field--how glad and willing they were to serve anywhere the Lord put them, even if behind the scenes. There were ever so many examples ...

... the cook serving in the hot kitchen, with the biggest grin on his face

... the missionaries, not seeking a name for themselves, and willing to live just like the people they reach out to

... the workers operating the printing press, doing manual labor in a room with very little cool air ... a coworker on the trip with me beautifully described it as a labor of love ...

... the radio broadcaster sitting in a small sound booth hidden away in an office on a sidestreet, pouring his heart out to people he will probably never see in this lifetime ...

Each person is willingly allowing God to use him ... and is making a tremendous eternal impact on unreached Asian communities.

....the cook because he provides food that the brothers preparing for full-time outreach need for survival.

....the missionaries because they are out there reaching villages with the hope of Christ, bringing glory to His name.

....the printing press workers because each year they produce 50 million pieces of Gospel literature--tracts and Scriptures that God is using to touch the hearts of precious unreached people.

....the radio broadcaster because he is part of GFA Radio, which broadcasts the Good News in 83 languages to millions in Asia.

Incredible. All glory to God.

I finished my big project today at the office. And during lunchtime I was able to prepare what I'll be sharing tomorrow about the India trip, to the other women on staff. Yay! :o)

Tomorrow my friend Jen and I are going to lunch together. I'm looking forward to that. And my weekend plans? Traveling a few hours away to hang out with my sister and brother-in-law, and their two cute little boys. I can't wait!

Tonight Karen and I met up so we could catch up and she could see pictures from my India trip. We were matched up so she could be my mentor for new staff class. The class is long over, but we still enjoy hanging out, and I appreciate her friendship.

We met up at Dunkin Donuts, where she had a hot chocolate with donuts, and I had two scoops of Baskin Robbins ice cream--one scoop strawberry cheesecake and the other mint chocolate chip. :o) It's been a good day. I'm going to bed now.

Part Two about the volunteer from Washington state
(see yesterday's entry)

We ate lunch together in the office kitchen and had such a fruitful time of fellowship. I sure did enjoy chatting with her. She wanted to know all about my perspective on the ministry and getting to serve here. I wish she were here longer so we could hang out some more! She senses the Lord directing her to a different job at this point in her life. Of course, I would love to see her come work with us. :o) She really likes this ministry. I told her I would pray for the Lord's direction in her life.

Another awesome thing happened over lunch. She told me she thought there was a reason we met in the parking lot the other the other day, especially when we could have so easily missed running into each other. I think so, too. That made my day.

At the house where I had Easter dinner, the kids kept presenting me with pictures they'd colored. It was too cute. : ) Tonight I had Kids Korner for our Sunday night service. We had fun. The kids were quite energetic ... I teased that they'd had a bunch of candy today.

My roommate Dorinda got back from the camping trip this afternoon. It's good to have her back. I missed her. It was fun hearing stories from the weekend. She says we'll all likely have future camping trips. I hope so. : ) I'd love to go sometime.

Tonight when I drove back to the apartment and got out of the car, I thought back to a tradition our family had. Growing up, I remember us having popcorn after Sunday evening church and watching something on TV. It was a fun time that I miss some nights. I realized I won't ever go back to those years ... they are gone, and I'm grown up now and "on my own".

Yet as I was writing to a coworker just now, what a privilege it is to labor here for His kingdom. My parents miss me too, but are glad I'm here doing what the Lord has called me to do--and being a part of something that is so dear to their hearts.

Yesterday morning was such a good time of worship. When you really stop and think what Jesus went through for us on the Cross, and how much He loves us--Wow! We will only grasp it very dimly in this lifetime, yet I want to live each day with His love and sacrifice in view. I find it totally changes my perspective and how I live from day to day.

It is cold this morning! I'm having Easter dinner with a nice family here on staff. Yesterday I picked something up at the office, and as I was leaving a volunteer from Washington state drove up and asked some questions. I was glad she and I got to meet and that I could answer her. I wonder if the Lord had me here this weekend so I could talk to her.

Today was a good day. I ended up getting up early (7:20 A.M.) and getting some things done. Then I went hiking at a lake in the next town. It was beautiful outside. I also wrote notes on quite a few of my newsletters.

Then I went walking again and spent some time with the Lord at a lake in a nearby neighborhood. I prayed for several field leaders and for the going forth of the Gospel in Asia. The Lord filled me with His sweet peace and encouraged my heart. How loving and kind He is.

I went grocery shopping tonight. A group of young people on staff is going camping for a few days. It sure does sound like fun, but after praying I felt the Lord would have me stay here over the three-day weekend.

I have to say I got a little sad when I passed by a coworker's apartment on my way home tonight and saw the canoe tied to his car. At the same time, I know it will be good to rest and hang out around here and get stuff done--and I'm excited about what the weekend holds. Plus, Dorinda was saying they'll likely be doing another campout in early summer. Maybe I can go on that one. :o)

My newsletters are ready, so this weekend I can write notes on them and get them in them ready to mail. I am really hoping to send them all out early next week. I'm eager to let my supporters know some of the things I was so impacted by in India. My hope is it will encourage and inspire them in their walks with the Lord. I appreciate each of them so much.

Today during my lunch break I spent time with the Lord. Even though I didn't have food in my stomach this afternoon, I felt encouraged. Psalm 63 talks about longing after God, and the ultimate satisfaction that comes from Him.

One verse in the chapter mentions that His lovingkindness is better than life. (Psalm 63:3) I believe this is how the believers on the field in Asia are able to give their lives for His sake. They realize that no matter what they face, the love of Jesus is greater and will see them through. Wow. Such love for their Savior. Such faith.

Tonight I picked up the last of my India pictures (YAY!), used a Chick-fila coupon for supper and found a GREAT sale at Foley's, where I was able to get some work clothes. I had a fun night.

When I got back to the apartment I got to chat with and pray with each of my roommates. I really enjoyed that. Then I logged on to my blog and saw someone had added a comment. (Yep, you can add comments now ... I had my computer savy roommate help me with that the other day. :O)) That was such an encouragement.

Tomorrow I get my last roll of pictures from India. I can't wait! You know the project I mentioned needing prayer for? Well, today I got together a rough draft, and it didn't that long at all. Thank You, Lord!

Well, I'm guessing I won't write much more tonight. I'm sleepy.

I had a very important lunch errand ... picking up mint chocolate chip ice cream for dinner tonight. :o) Ruth, Cara and I had invited a potential staff member to eat with us. I enjoyed hearing her story, of how it had been on her heart to serve the Lord in full-time ministry, and then someone from GFA came to her church and talked about what the Lord is doing in Asia. She was touched, and got REALLY excited when he mentioned we have many staff openings that need to be filled. "I didn't even stick around for worship," she told us. "I ran back there and made sure I caught him." And now, here she is--seeking the Lord's will on her life, asking Him whether He would have her serve here. Praise God.

Right after we dove into the mint chocolate chip ice cream, Ruth told us of incredible stories she had heard ... stories of a man who had no salary but trusted God for His every need. A man who lived in such a way that only his basic needs were met ... if he had any more after that, he would give it away. The Lord always provided. That inspires me. I think I especially want to be more giving of my time. More focused and purposeful, realizing that we have such a short time on this earth, even if we do live a full life. The message at church yesterday was about living each day in the light of eternity. I'm so glad the Lord doesn't give up on me ... that He is so patient and loving toward me, continually molding me. Aren't you glad He doesn't give up on us, too?

I had a nice chat with my friend Heather from back home when she called this afternoon. We had some good laughs about funny moments from my India trip. :o) It will be so much fun catching up with her and Jessica when I'm back in town.

Looking over my 175+ pictures (from India) the other night, I realized that each one has a story ... often an incredible one. I've been putting them into an album and want so badly to write the stories in, but first I'd really like to see about getting a few reprints from others who were on the trip. That way my album will be complete. For instance, I didn't get a picture of Gretcha (see April 2), but someone else did. It's great working with such a big family ... One of my coworkers and friends that I had lunch with before our trip joked that if we forgot to pack anything, someone else was bound to have it. So true!

There are some web writing projects I need to work on. Please pray for me. One of them involves several others on the team and is part of a much bigger project, and I don't want to hold anybody up. You can pray for the Lord to reveal His heart to me and that I will have the focus and discipline to work on it when He would have me to.

The rest of this day was so much fun, too. :o) We had a great time playing sand volleyball, and then we all hung out afterwards. Then tonight at the office we had a movie night for anyone who wanted to come. I enjoyed that. When we three got back to the apartment, we prayed together and had roommate chats about eternity and then, a little later on, diving for the ball in sand volleyball. We had some good talks. Then I said, "We, I mean I, better go to bed." One of my roommates teased, "In other words, you want us all to go to bed so you don't miss out on any of the excitement." I think I hear my pillow calling my name ... But I'm so thankful for friends and my two roommates, who are also my friends.

It's a beautiful spring day! Been having a great Saturday so far. Bunches got done on my to-do list, and my roommate and I had fun grabbing lunch at Chick-fila. Around 2:00 we're meeting up with some other young people to play some sand volleyball. :o)

Tonight was incredible. I don't even know if I could put it all into words, but I will sure try. We had the chance to share again about our trip to India. The video clips my brothers and sisters showed--and the things the Lord used to impact their hearts--brought the whole experience back to me in such a fresh way. I literally felt like I was there all over again. It was a precious time and such a reminder that what we are doing with our lives is so much worth it. I saw it over and over again ...

... in the joy that radiated through Gretcha, the woman I mentioned a few days ago ... a brother talked about the contrast between her and the people in those slums who don't yet know Jesus ... and how we're getting to live our lives in such a way that people such as Gretcha get to hear about Jesus Christ ...

... another brother on staff talked about the religious statues he saw, and the bondage that represents, when all we need for salvation is Jesus and Him alone ... He mentioned the opportunity we have to reach people and bring them the hope of the living God ...

... a pastor who willingly chose to live in a slum area so he could reach them with the Good News ... for a year and a half he patiently ministered and cried out to God on their behalf ... finally there was a breakthrough and the way was paved for a church of new believers to be started ... the brother who shared about this tonight told us something that greatly impacted him ... he said this pastor chose to breathe their air, eat their food, touch their dirt-smudged faces and embrace them, even as Jesus did for mankind, despite our ugliness and utter wretchedness.

I don't want to ever forget these moments ... how the Lord touched my heart ... when I am tempted to complain, seek my own gain or be lazy, may I remember the dedication of our dear brethren in Asia. What a great cloud of witnesses we have! (Hebrews 12:1) Praise God.

I had such a good night. Jen and I went to the children's Easter program at my church, followed by congregational fellowship over pizza at Cici's. The kids were very fun to watch. Their funny expressions, frequent "off-key" singing, and made-up hand motions just made them even more adorable. :o)

We got to sit with the nicest couple at Cici's, Nancy and Bill. The wife had volunteered with GFA several years back, and I got to tell them about my India trip. I very much enjoyed our time together and am hoping we get to see more of them. The four of us had some great laughs over a truck we saw in the parking lot. Just the tires alone were almost as tall as Jen and I! We couldn't imagine someone trying to climb up into the cab, let alone driving at such a high altitude.